Red

47

Talks of suicide attempt.

"Wanna go to this amazing diner we've got here?" Lance asks, hand squeezed tight in Keith's.

After leaving Lance's house they had been walking for a bit, Lance showing Keith around his hometown.

"Sure, didn't get to eat much."

"Sorry. Dinner is- dinner is always hectic with them."

"Yeah, I'll bet." Keith laughs.

"Hey- can- can you believe we're graduating soon?"

"Yeah, its pretty crazy huh?"

"What- where are you going for college? Are- are you gonna leave Arizona?" Lance asks, chewing on his bottom lip nervously.

"I-Im not sure. I haven't really put much thought into this. I never thought- I never thought I'd be alive this long, Lance. Before- before we met I-I had planned to- Lance I had tried to kill myself so I wasn't such a burden on Shiro. I fucked his life up, he- he could've been happy and married- for- for fuck sake he could've gone to college." Keith's voice trembles as he speaks, stuttering and stumbling over his words.

Lance's eyes widen, hand shaking in Keith's.

"You-you were- K-Keith..."

"Don't! Don't- I don't need pity." Keith whispers, pausing before he speaks up again.

"I was- Lance I took my pills, all of them. S-Shiro found me- he found me in-in the bathroom with- fucking hell... He fucking found me drowning in my own- I was fucking foaming at the mouth and I had blood- just- that's what- thats what those two big jagged scars are... Lance- I shattered the mirror in the bathroom- I fucking- I slit my wrists and took my pills because I couldn't stand to- couldn't- I fucking couldn't ruin Shiro's life anymore." Keith was holding back tears and that was obvious. He had looked down and his hair had fallen over his eyes.

He bites on his own tongue, tears just threatening to spill. Even Pidge didn't know this. His own best friend.

"They- they almost didnt make it. I- I stopped breathing Lance. They did cpr and pumped my stomach and sewed me up and everything. Death was- Lance it was so quiet. There- there isn't anything- it's cold-it's-it's-it's-"

"Shh. Shut up. Stop- stop fucking talking." Lance whimpers, taking Keith into his hold. He had started crying as soon as Keith had said he tried to kill himself.

"Please... Let me talk to you about this- Pidge doesn't even know. I- I freaked out so bad back there because I thought- I thought I did it again. I thought I fucking slit them- there- I could see the blood I could feel it. Lance I wake up in a cold sweat and checking my arms and meds because of it."

Lance holds him tighter, shushing him. Running his fingers through his hair.

"But- Lance, you- you've given me some hope that- that the world isn't so- so fucked. You've shown me that I can be loved and not be a burden on someone. You've showed me life isn't just- that relationships don't just have to be relentless sex and taking from the other party. You- you showed me that I- that I am a good person. That- that I shouldn't just give up hope because of something small. You've fought through hell and look- look at where you are. Youre so strong and that makes me want to- to be a better person and be strong. You- you are amazing Lance."

"Dont- dont fucking say that." Lance whispers, tears streaming down his cheeks. This all sounded like some fucked up marriage proposal.

"I love you Lance- You are my Blue."

"And you're my red." Lance whispers.

After sitting on the sidewalk crying for 20 minutes they had made their way back to Lance's house, dismissing the idea of the diner.