An: oh come on, did you really think that Fili and Kili wouldn't tell Thorin about Bilbo's first time? And I have an idea who he could be... someone called Frerin Durin perhaps? ;)
Thorin POV:
I heard Kili and Fili talking about Bilbo having sex with a dwarf. A dwarf. Who wasn't me. I think I'm going to have a stern conversation with them.
"Fili?"
"Yes Uncle?"
"Give me all the information you can find about a dwarf who went 23 years ago to the Shire and met a nice hobbit one night stand!"
"Okay.... where do I find it?"
"In the large library down the hall. Good luck."
"Thank you Uncle. But why are you interested in Bilbo's lose of virginity?"
"Don't act stupid Fili you aren't."
"Don't act stern when you're helpless uncle it doesn't suit you to play dumb."
"I know sister-son, I know. But I really need to know who that dwarf was."
"What are you implying? What do you know what we dont?"
Oh shit.
"N-nothing. Nothing at all. Why would you ever think that?"
"You just stuttered."
"S-so?"
"You're nervous."
"Yes I am. What if I know the dwarf?"
"You can kill him?"
"Good idea, but no."
"What if he raped Bilbo?"
"Then I would kill him, but Bilbo wasn't raped, otherwise he wouldn't talk so willingly about it, right?"
"I hope so, uncle. Bilbo doesn't deserve that."
"I know. Bilbo deserves the world."
"And you would give him?"
"Everything."
"What he deserves?"
"And more."
"AWWWWWW"
"Fili....."
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For accepting him."
"Well as long as he can stand you it's alright, isn't it?"
"Oh, shut up"
AN; ehehehehehe I love these good old family bonds :) Speaking about which, did you see 007? Love you Guys <3 AND IM LATE DAMM1T like really damn late but hey I'm still alive
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