breathless >> Zayn Malik <<

3.4

Emilia wears a confused look when we all arrived in front of her. Just as much as all of us hate to say it, but we need to let her know that we are here for her. She doesn't need to hide. At all.

I hugged her without any hesitation. She never hugged back, just stared into the clouds. I could feel tears taunting me to well up but, I fought back. I was in fear. Fear of losing her.

Ashton stood there still. Like a statue, frozen as his eyes scanned Emilia's pale body, staring into the uninteresting cloud. Emilia wasn't shocked. But she was confused. And I can't say whether she's mad, or sad.

She finally hugged me back, bringing my body closer to her, as I feel my breath on her neck. A sister. The call shouted into my ear. Forever. Now, I can say, I might be crying.

"Hey." She sniffs. I could hear tears under her breath. Was she crying? I asked myself, uncertain of what was coming. I smiled, once she was back to reality now.

"Hey." I said. Our heights was the same. I never saw that. I never cared. I never wanted to know. I have been taking her for granted. I hope she knows I love her. She have to. No matter what.

"Em." Ashton whispers as I saw her running for Ashton. They hugged. I don't know why but, my heart aches. She can go away anytime soon. Because, nothing can be predicted. Emilia is always unpredictable.

"Ashton." it turns out into a muffle, as she snuggled into Ashton's chest. Zayn stood there in awe. Even though his face was straight, I could see tears in his eyes. How long does it take for him to be that strong? I asked myself.

Then, my eyes turn over towards Emilia. How long does it takes her to just smile and don't give a damn about her life? I kept all those questions in. As if they never existed. Emilia won't tell us about the time left for her to stay with us--alive, I meant. I just, I don't want to think about what will happen after that. She'll be gone, forever--dead.

My tears threatens me again but, I bite my lip to force them back in.

-

Emilia smiles as we all took a walk across the streets. Ashton and me was asked to sit beside of a tree. I stared into Ashton's face. The innocent guy. I don't know. I felt a pang of guilt inside of me somehow.

Zayn was called over Emilia's side. I stayed in place, slowly drifting to sleep, as my head rests on the tree.

-

Zayn's POV

I keep my face straight. Not that I was trying to act tough but, I can't stand to see Emilia this way. Terra and Ashton told me everything when we were on our way. And it took me everything I had just to keep myself from crying.

I followed Emilia, as she stood beside of a swing --a place we used to play together while we were younger. I smiled up to her, as a laugh left her lips. She was the younger sister I used to love. Why must she go first?

This isn't fair. Then again, I remembered what Emilia used to tell me.

Nothing is predictable. You think it's gonna rain, then, it becomes a sunny day. You think you're acting fair, but jealousy lies ahead.

My stomach churns from those words. When was Emilia a quoter? No, she never was. She was a girl. An inspired one. Bravery is her twin. Fears are her enemies. She fears nothing. Nothing at all. But one.

Heights? No. Fire? She plays with it the whole time. Bloods? Every single drop of her own was seen by herself. Death? She wanted that to be her future. Darkness? Lies between her.

The only thing I could see, that could bring her down, was the sadness in her friendship. When a cracking comes over towards the relationship she built between them all, she breaks down.

I bet she even cries anymore. It took me ages to figure her out. She was brave. But not fearless. She have her own fears. Even if she calls it her enemy. A crack between a relationship, was her fear.

She smiles up to me and laughed as she pushes me into the playground. Swings that we used to play on. Lake we used to throw rocks into. Birds we used to feed. All of the childhood memories. It makes me feel, alive. Then, I remembered Emilia and the word death comes across.

"Hey, Zaynie," she calls out. The name was once I used to hate. But now, I want her to call me that, as a brother who could protect her. She find somebody to replace that. To take that duty. She replaced herself with Terra.

"Yeah?" I answered and turn towards her. She used to be so small. Why did I not see that she was growing? She was my sister I need to take care of. That I can't put her walls down.

She smiled as she was swinging back and forth on the swings. I smiled to her back. Emilia Rosy Diaz. You are one true sister. No wonder Terra needs you so much. I can't even say a thing now. The only words that left me was, "I love you, sister."

"Love you too, brother." she said as she smacks her hand towards me. My eyes blink, forcing back a tear. "Stay safe. Trust yourself," that wasn't all she said. "Take care of Terra. Of all of them." she finished.

"I promise." I said, as we continued to have fun on the swings.

-

I walk back towards the place we left Ashton and Terra and saw them both asleep. I took a look on Terra's face.

Ashton grunts and Emilia grabs his arms before pulling him ahead. Ashton grunted but stayed still with her. She peeks over his eyes and kissed his nose. I smiled, as I carried Terra to the car.

Emilia and us split. I sent Terra home. Ashton was with Emilia. We never talk about her disease or anything. We only spoke up a little, and had fun like kids.

I can't help it. I let a tear escapes my eye. Suddenly, Terra's hand slides against mine. That was when I saw, she was already wide awake.

"How long?" I asked her.

"Before you got to cry." she said, knowing that I was asking about the time she has been staring at me.

"Sorry." I said, as her thumb went across my cheeks, wiping away my tears.

"Sometimes, it's okay to cry," she said, but doesn't finished it. "rather than let it all in." she finished.

She's right. Sometimes, it's better to let it out. Instead of keeping it all inside.

-

My body collapse right on the couch of Terra's living room. Her parents were home. Doesn't mean I'm a criminal. I was exhausted. From everything --Well, not all but, still exhausted.

Terra comes around and gave a mug. The inviting aroma makes me feel calm. I smiled up to her, as she smiled back to me.

"Rest." she said, as she cuddled up next to me. Her heart beat was steady, as mine. I don't know why. Emilia's voice of asking me to take care of her makes me feel drowned.

I'll take care of her.

I promise.

-

OKAY.... NO... IM NOT OKAY!!