He closed the door,
He hides behind the face nobody knows,
He feels his skin touch the floor
Andy closed his bathroom door behind him as he let himself slide down to it. Andy pulled his knees close to him as tears where streaming down his face. Andy couldn't believe what had just happened. His heart aching in pain, chest tightened as he kept sobbing frantically, but he couldn't. Andy felt the cold tiles as he slid down on it. Andy's eyes still full of tears and pain, the once so blue eyes lost all it's color. The hate Andy was receiving was too much. He couldn't take it, he didn't understand why he got so much hate. Wasn't he enough? Was he that ugly and fat? Or is it his voice? It does sound a bit to high and can crack and is just plain flat disgusting. All the build up emotions kept growing and growing inside him over the past year and finally he got to his own breaking point.
Andy couldn't breath properly only sob like a maniac. Lucky for him everyone was out. Andy wiped his cheeks only for new tears to come, Andy sighed as he got to his feet leaning on the bathtub. As he came face to face with the mirror he almost puked at the look he held. Pathetic. Just like what everyone thinks of him. He isn't worth it, he's nothing but a piece of crap. Brooklyn should hate him to, his beautiful boyfriend. Andy sighed it wasn't fair. Andy looked at his shaky hands, eyes locking on a razor on top of the drawer's. Maybe? No. He promised. Andy choked back a sob before running out of the bathroom he couldn't stay any longer. Fake a smile next day. Fake your happiness.
He wants to fight
But his eyes are tired, nobody's on his side
He wants to feel like he did before.
Andy was sat next to Rye and Jack at the dinner table just playing around with his still filled plate. Brooklyn who was sitting in front of him shared a concerned look with the other's while looking closely at his boyfriend. The tired expression Andy held was enough to set off alarm bells to Brooklyn. After dinner Brooklyn followed Andy only for him to shut and lock his bedroom before Brooklyn even could slip into the room.
"Baby please let me in.."
"No! L-Leave please.."
"Can't do that. Talk to me please."
"I'm a fuck up Brooke! That's what you wanna hear!? I can't feel! I'm done! Leave!"
He looks into his mirror
Wishing someone could hear him, so loud
And I need love to hold me closer
In the night, just enough.
Andy could hear the faint footsteps leave his door. He then finally let himself break down again on his bed. He simply wanted Brooklyn to come back, hold him and love him. Stay with him throughout the night. But he couldn't manage the words of 'help' to get through his mouth. Andy eyed his mirror once again, a reflection that used to present himself wasn't there anymore. All there was left was a person tired to fight through his wounds and pain. Andy knew he needed the love and protection of Brooklyn, the only person who could heal him.
I need love to hold me closer
In the night, just enough
To feel my body come alive
When my bones start breaking,
My heart starts shaking
I need love, need love.
Andy finally unlocked his door and left his room in the middle of the night. Andy tiptoed towards Brooklyn's room and opened the door to see him still wide awake on his bed with the tv on. As the door made a sound Brooklyn immediately looked up at the door seeing Andy for the first time since dinner.
"Andy?"
Andy didn't say anything just stepped down and walked to Brooklyn, eyes watering with every step he took, his chest getting tighter, his hearts shaking. "Make me alive again. Please. When my bones start breaking, or when my heart starts shaking. Please help me." Brooklyn stood up and grabbed Andy close to him, hugging him tightly, muttering sweet nothings in his ears. Andy was a sobbing mess in his arms as he kept a tight hold on him. After finally calming down for the first time in days ever Andy finally stopped crying and fall a sleep right into the arms of the only one who could protect him and keep his demons away from the surface.
The coffee's cold.
He turned around and said, "I hope you know
You're beautiful. Have you ever been told?"
He's a little shy
As he walks away, he slowly breaks a smile
The skies are blue, haven't been for a while.
Andy sat in the chair, a cup of coffee standing in front of him. Already cold due the long time he had been sitting down there. Brooklyn walked into the kitchen seeing Andy and smiled "You're beautiful. Have you ever been told?" Brooklyn kissed Andy's cheeks as Andy's cheeks started going a deep shade of red. Brooklyn then left the room. Andy smiled widely for the first time in weeks again, the skies where not only just grey but slightly blue. The blue is slowly seeping into the dark cloud that had been drawn over him, the grey slowly fading.
Andy put the coffee away and walked up the stairs towards his room. Brooklyn smiled as Andy looked at him like he was crazy. "Sit babe. I'm going to sing you song okay?" Andy frowned but sat down in front of him slowly.
He looks into her mirror
Wishing someone could hear him, so loud.
I need love to hold me closer
In the night, just enough
To feel my body come alive
When my bones start breaking,
My heart starts shaking
I need love, need love.
He closed the door
He hides behind the face nobody knows
He feels his skin touch the floor.
I need love to hold me closer
In the night, just enough
To feel my body come alive
When my bones start breaking,
My heart starts shaking
I need love, need love.
When Brooklyn finished Andy was in tears, Andy grabbed onto Brooklyn hugging him as he kept sobbing. "You are safe baby. I got you." Andy nodded "Just talk to me whenever you feel like this ever again okay?" Andy once again nodded as he held tightly onto Brooklyn like his life depended on it. Maybe he was right he should've told him everything sooner but his stubborn side didn't allow him to do so. Only now he maybe could let things go and let Brooklyn help him out once in a while.
