My Downfall | Killers List #3

Far gone

Yujus feet dragged her downstairs in almost a slow motion way. She was more exhausted then ever. It was 8 in the morning and she hadn't gone to bed till 1 in the morning. Everyone mostly likely didn't go to bed until 1 because of the loudness coming from one of the rooms.

"Up late last night too?" Yerin asked once Yuju came into the kitchen. She was currently brewing some coffee for herself but now that Yuju was awake she might as well make a second one for her.

"Yeah. I don't even want to know what was going on in that room" Yuju shook her head, trying to forget the noises she heard last night.

"They fucked obviously. They're adults, they're going to have sex. Anyways I just wish they were more considerate. Like you do realize other people are trying to sleep right?" Yerin scoffed as she grabbed her mug from the cabinet.

"I know right. It's annoying" Yuju agreed as she also reached into the cabinet for her plain white mug.

"Like they could've fucked in her car instead of in a room next to all the other rooms" Yerin rolled her eyes a she poured coffee into Yuju's mug and then into her own mug.

"Yeah but don't you think having sex in a car would be a bit difficult and weird?" Yuju asked as she and Yerin sat down at the table.

"Well how would you know? Have you had-"

"No. No!" Yuju interrupted her before she could say more. "I'm a virgin, I swear on my life"

"I know you're innocent. I think we all our except for Eunha, Sowon, and Umji...wait that means half of us" Yerin didn't realize that half of them weren't virgins until now. It had just dawned on her.

"Wait Umji? Who is she with?"

"She's not with anyone actually. Once you left she went in to kind of a depression and started drinking a lot of alcohol. She was drunk and accidentally slept with a man" Yerin explained. She had only explained the story about two or three times now but she was still annoyed that she had to repeat it. She didn't like talking about other people's personal business. She didn't feel it was her place to tell Yuju but she couldn't keep it a secret anymore.

"Why didn't I know this? Damnit. This is my fault. Oh my god. I have to talk to her...is this why she's been ignoring me ever since I got here? She seems extremely angry with me" Yuju laid her head in her hands. She was frustrated with herself for not knowing about Umji's past situation and that she was the one that caused it to happen to her.

"Obviously, she had to kill a human" Yerin wasn't making the situation any better. Sometimes she said things without realizing that they were inappropriate and quite disrespectful.

"How am I supposed to forgive myself? How is she going to forgive me?" Yuju felt like crying. She was stressed and worried that Umji would never be her best friend again. She thought maybe their relationship would never return.

"I think she has already forgiven you. I think she just wants you to talk to her" Yerin frowned at Yuju who was massaging the sides of her head. It was definitely a situation that caused a headache, especially for Yuju since she cares deeply for the people she loves.

"Well what do I say? How do I even start a conversation about a dead human, a dead baby. I'm not a doctor, I don't have to tell people that someone or their loved ones have passed away to a better place" Yuju looked up at Yerin, a look that was asking for help, pleading for help actually.

"Just go talk to her. I think she's practicing the piano in the other room" Yerin pointed to the room across from them.

"I'm nervous" Yuju said and looked back at Yerin as she walked towards the white room.

"You got this. You have confidence, I know you do" Yerin gave her two thumbs up as Yuju opened the door.

"Umji...can we talk?" Yuju asked as she shut the door behind her.

"I mean we both have voice boxes and have talked before, so are we capable of speaking? Yes" Umji decided to be a smartass but Yuju was still quite confused.

"I don't understand the joke"

"It's not a joke. You said CAN we talk, and I answered. Yes we are both able to speak. The correct way is may we talk?" Umji made sure to emphasize the word can.

"May we talk? Or speak?" Yuju asked again but correctly this time.

"Yes we may, I don't see why we need to communicate with each other though" Umji shrugged and kept her fingers and hands resting on the piano keys.

"Well can't you stop playing for a moment?" Yuju looked at Umji's fingers that were holding the keys down.

"Sure whatever" Umji removed her hands and rested then on her legs.

"I know this will be a difficult topic for you, and for me but you went through it so I'm sure it's a lot more painful to speak about it. Anyways I'm going to get straight to the point" Yuju stood in front of the piano and kept her eyes glued to Umji's. "I know you had an abortion. I know you probably wanted to tell me yourself but you were waiting for the right time. Yerin accidentally told me a few minutes ago. Don't be angry with me or her please. I just want to know more, I need details, Yerin didn't tell me very much. I want to know if you're okay and if there's anything I can do to fix it or help you" Yuju spoke with soft and sad tone. She wasn't sure how to approach such a topic so she deiceded to just get right to it. She knew Umji is strong, but this was something so devastating that even she would be brought to tears.

"You can't fix something like this! You can't help me now! I'm too far gone! It's been so long! You think you can show up out of the blue and magically heal me?! You're a fucking bastard!" Umji was suddenly standing up and shouting at Yuju who was standing in front of her.

"I just want to help" Yuju had a fearful look in her eyes. Umji was scary when she was angry and Yuju wasn't fond of angry people.

"You can't help nor fix a dead baby! Are you stupid?! Get out of my face before I get beyond angry and harm you!" Umji yelled at her through gritted teeth.

"I'm sorry, I really am" Yuju ran out of the room, terrified half to death.