Randy||bxb||Roadtrip Oneshots

Living off Memories of Love pt.3

Rye stood in the doorway waiting to be invited in, if Andy wanted him to leave he would, preferably without making him too uncomfortable. However, Andy hadn't seemed to notice Rye yet. Probably still out of it. Then, their eyes met for the first time for what seemed like an eternity. Worried brown looked into slightly hazy blue.

"Hi," Andy managed to breathe out.

"Hey," the word hung uncomfortably in the air and Rye decided it wasn't enough. "How are you?"

"Better now, thank you. I'm still waiting to find out why I collapsed."

These were the first words they had exchanged for a year, and it didn't sit well with either of them. They both wanted to be able to lounge around lazily just like they used to. They were both, however, convinced the other was happy without them. So they didn't mention their desires. Anyway, that would be weird, just saying things like that. After a year.

"I spoke to one of your coworkers, have they gotten contact with anyone else?" He makes his way inside the room, feeling it's too awkward to merely stand in the doorway.

"I don't know, I didn't know they called you even. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cause a scene like this."

Andy's nails look the same as Rye remember them, simple white nail polish and twiddling in his lap. He would like to take one of the older boy's hands, more than anything. Something Rye had done countless times throughout the years. An act of love that calmed them both, touching without overdoing it. Remaining in contact through their fingers. Alas, Rye didn't. Andy had not asked him to. Andy had asked him to leave.

"Rye I think I just need to see the world, all I know is right here. How do we know that this is right?"

"Don't be sorry, you didn't cause a scene. You collapsed." He smiled warmly at Andy, he had to put his own damned feelings aside, "I was worried."

Even after all this time, Rye knew that this was something Andy was worried about. He had always hated disturbing others, getting attention was not his idea of fun. After all this time, his words were still enough, all he needed.

"Thank you," the smile Andy gave Rye was one only his former lover knew. Neither of them knew it, but that smile would come naturally when Rye made him feel the way only he could. "For coming here, really. It's been so long."

"Yeah, it really has. Tell me, have you found the world and its opportunities?" Rye regretted asking it as soon as it left his lips. He didn't want to know, all he cared was if Andy was happy. Still, he knew he wasn't strong enough to hear it. Not yet. Not ever.

He didn't want the other man to know that his smile was forced and he really wanted to sob.

Andy knew the world was teasing him. Here's what you left, well, you're such a wimp anyway. He wanted it all back, he had nothing to lose at this point, and he was willing to see if there was anything left to give if it meant being honest with Rye. Rye, who deserved so much. The truth was the least.

When it came to Rye, there was nothing else.

"I stumbled down the wrong path I think. I hit a lot of dead ends, I know now I had everything once. I have many regrets but you- leaving you was the biggest."

"Andy-"

"I know I screwed up, I just wanted you to know. It was always you, you were- are amazing. You never did anything wrong. I was just insecure, I-"

Rye had heard what he had worried about for a year, he had done nothing wrong. It may be selfish, but once he knew that Andy was okay, he had fallen into those tracks again. Why hadn't he been enough?

He let go. Rye let go of everything that was holding him back. Pulling the other boy into a sudden hug. A kiss may have been expected, but all he wanted was to do was to be close to the other. They could do more later when they were both on the same page. For now, they didn't speak; they let their tears hit the other's shoulder.

For now, they were enough.

They were certain, but they didn't have to be. For now, both men were sure. No matter what happens tomorrow, the feeling was still there.

They had each other. To live and make new memories. They no longer had to live off the old ones.

:::
Thank you for reading the third and final part Living off Memories of Love. I really hope you enjoyed it.

Happy Friday!

Jo xx