Dangerous Love

Chapter 16

Jess' POV

I don't know why I did it, but it happened. I had been wanting to do that for so long now and it felt so good to finally have her lips on mine. But should I have done it? After I was honest to myself about all of my feelings, I was still in denial. I had a feeling that I had just completely and utterly ruined our friendship. Yes she kissed me back, but did she only do that because it would have been awkward to pull away? Most likely. I had a habit of fucking things up. Nothing can ever be simple.

But if we forget about all of that for a minute. The kiss. Her lips were so soft and just fitted perfectly with mine. It wasn't necessarily passionate, it was just... magical. Yeah, I'm cheesy aren't I? No kiss from anyone, ever; has ever made me feel like she made me feel. I just felt so at home when I was with her. I could be myself and we could talk about absolutely nothing and it could mean everything. The time I spent with her was precious and I wasn't going to let it go to waste. Never would I do that.

But at this moment in time... I probably shouldn't have kissed her. It wasn't like she was going to feel the same. Yes we had a connection that no-one could deny, but maybe it wasn't the type of connection I wished it had been.

I pulled away and looked down into my palms. Everything was silent for a minute, the only sounds which could be heard were the wind and the engines of cars as they drove by. I didn't dare look up. ''Woah.''

''I'm sorry.'' I whispered, almost inaudible.

''What?''

''I said I'm sorry.'' I looked up at her, but didn't look in her eyes. ''I only did it to distract you, I wasn't being serious, don't worry.'' I started to pack the food up back into the basket whilst saying this. It made it easier to tell the complete lie that I just had.

''Oh, um. Yeah. I didn't know what to do so I just sort of returned the kiss.''

''Mmmhmm, no hard feelings or anything. We're just friends after all.'' I was digging myself a hole but I think she believed me. I hated myself more than anything right now. I felt the opposite to what I was saying, however if I told her this, everything would be too complicated. I felt like a monster. Why didn't she hate me?

~Emelia's POV~

I won't lie, I was broken when she said she didn't mean the kiss like I did. But I guess that's just my luck, I'd be stupid to think that she'd like me in that way. I'm not that lucky! But I was going to take what I could get. If that was just being friends with her, then that was enough for me.

The long walk back to the car was awkward to say the least. Neither of us knew what to say after earlier. What were we supposed to say? She had made it pretty clear that she didn't mean it, and I had accepted that. But this silence was killing me, more than what had hurt me earlier. I had to sort this out. I didn't care if she didn't like me in that way right now, I just wanted Jess to be Jess.

I stopped walking and Jess turned around to face me. ''What?'' She shrugged her shoulders.

''You know what. This silence is getting silly now.''

''I'm not in the mood for talking Emelia.'' She resumed her walking, speeding up in attempt to leave me.

''Jess, talk to me.'' She didn't reply. ''Jess we need to sort this out.'' Nothing, again. ''Jess stop walking and fucking listen to me.''

She knew I meant business now. I was tired from all of the walking and frankly just couldn't be bothered. She stopped pacing and walked closer to me. ''We said all that needed to be said earlier Emelia.''

''Far from actually, Jess. I have a lot to say.''

''Go on then. I'm listening.''

''Ok, I get that the kiss may have been an accident and you didn't mean it, and that's fine. But I need us to be ok again.''

''We are ok, Emelia.'' She stressed her voice slightly.

''No we're fucking not, Jess. You've been off with me since it happened, and you know it.'' I retorted, raising my voice.

''Fine. A lot is going on in my mind and I just needed take some space to think for a moment.''

''Well what were you thinking about? I don't expect for the kiss to mean anything. You didn't mean it, I didn't either. That's fine, ok. I get it. It's stupid leaving the conversation on a bad note. I want my best friend.''

''And you have her. She's here.'' Jess replied, putting her hand to herself.

''Well then, let's just forget about it.''

''Pretend it never happened.'' She agreed with me, nodding.

''Ok then, I'm glad that's sorted.'' I sighed with relief, wincing slightly.

''Best friends?'' Jess asked, tilting her head as she looked to me.

''Best friends.'' I confirmed, smiling.

Yeah, we probably sounded like a pair of girls in primary schools who had just made up after an argument, but I didn't care. Confirming that you're still 'best friends' is needed.

~Jess' POV~

I didn't mean what I said at all. But she wouldn't want to be anything more than friends, would she?

~Emelia's POV~

I couldn't tell Jess how I really felt. We've got this close and I wasn't going to ruin it. Besides, she wouldn't want to be anything more than friends, would she?

A/N: I know I haven't updated in a while but I plsn to update quite a bit this weekend so you're in luck. Also, sorry if the whole frequent change in POV is hard to keep up with, that was only for this chapter, it won't happen as much again. I just thought the ending was effective. Opinions? Thank you for reading.