KittyHazelnut is Weird

Fuck

I was all ready to start bragging about how I basically said fuck you to depression because I started this new workout treadmill program thing called Couch to 5k and I've been doing it for 40 minutes every other day instead of 30 because I've been watching Changing Channels every time I do it, and I got new healthy water flavor packets so I'm getting all hydrated an ish, and yesterday I went in for an interview and got a new job at Target so now I'm working 2 jobs (because Target pays $13 an hour and has a 10% employee discount, so if all 4 deluxe editions of Taylor Swift's new album, Lover, out August 23rd, are $20 like the reputation magazines were, that'll be $80 which is $72 with my discount which is less than 6 hours at target instead of 10 hours at Aeropostale fuck yeah I'm gonna be rich), and finally we're getting info about the Cats movie with Taylor Swift and Jason Derulo and James Cordon and Idris Elba and a bunch of other celebrities and it's gonna be great and my life was finally coming together

And then yesterday after my target interview, my mom picked out her outfit for my grandmother's funeral, and said that I should probably start getting used to the idea that it could be very soon, and then today she had the priest at my grandmother's place today for the anointing of the sick, which is basically one last blessing before someone dies, because my grandmother has both Alzheimers and a brain tumor and she's been declining quickly and we don't know how long she has left and some days she can't even function and honestly why do I even bother trying to get my life together when I know something like this is gonna happen?

Anyway I'm gonna go read fanfics until I fall asleep