Daily Bible Reading and Prayer 3 Jun 6, '19-Jan 17, '20 Proverbs n Ecclesiastes

Oct 4

Hey guys! How are you all doing? I'm still not well, but I finally kinda have a diagnosis! I went to the doc yesterday and all the test results so far have come back normal, I'm still waiting for another test, it'll take around a month before I get that test done, but if that test comes back normal as well then the doc said I probably have chronic fatigue syndrome or something similar to that. Unfortunately there is no cure, and since it's chronic that means I'll have it my whole life. Thankful there are some things that can help a little bit, some medications and lifestyle changes, I still have to do more research on those though. It sucks. I won't be able to get a normal job, and idk if I'll ever be able to take care of any kids in the future. Me and Will want to have kids one day but seeing as I'm often to ill to take care of myself, I probably won't be able to take care of kids. The best I can hope for is that I can find something to make things a bit easier, if I do I might be able to take care of myself and hopefully Will if we get married, just be a housekeeper and if I'm really lucky I might find a job that I can work from home with very few hours. It's tough. I've accepted that I won't be able to live a normal life and I have many limitations but I think Will is in denial. He's said many times he wants to still be with me no matter what, even if my health stays bad but I can't stop the thoughts that say he might leave me because who wants to date and one day marry someone with a chronic illness like me. It's frustrating living like this. I want to do so many things, I want to experience life but I can't even do my own laundry and cooking right now much less go hiking or shopping or anything like that. And now I've got a nasty headache and can't finish devotions so I'll just publish this. I love you guys, I'll try to publish some actual devotions instead of my rambling next time. 🤗💕❤️🤗💕❤️