Daily Bible Reading and Prayer 3 Jun 6, '19-Jan 17, '20 Proverbs n Ecclesiastes

Nov 27

Hey guys. Idk what to do. I'm going through a pretty tough time right, I'm thinking ranting about it a little will help so I hope you don't mind. As you know my health isn't good, I have to use a cane to walk around cause I'm so weak and dizzy, and it's so difficult to eat that I've lost over 10 pounds in the last few months. My head, chest, and abdomen often hurt, and I've had so many doctor appointments and tests with no answers and it's quite frustrating. As if that wasn't enough I have a lot of drama in my life. I have two older brothers who have been abusive in the past, to the point of cops being involved and I hate seeing them. On Monday one of them came over, thankfully Will took me on a date so I could avoid him, but I was really anxious. Sometimes I get so anxious because of my brothers that I self harm a bit. I haven't told anyone that other than Will. The internet is great for telling secrets, right? Anyways the brother who was here on Monday kinda has a daughter, he was dating a girl that was pregnant and apparently wants to help raise that baby. He's not dating her anymore but he still posts pics of him and the baby on social media. Now he's dating a girl who is in high school even though he's 20. He hangs out with a known pimp, drug dealers and gang members. He stole some stuff from my other brother and that pimp he hangs with kidnaped a friend of the other brother, so they've disowned each other and have sworn to kill each other next time they meet. I wouldn't be surprised if they are capable of murder. The second brother was here today and he got in an argument with my parents so he whipped a tv remote at my dad's head. Thankfully he missed, but the wall has a dent and the remote fell into pieces. He hopefully won't be back soon, but seeing as he spends all his money on video games instead of food, and he knows there is free food here, he might be back in a few weeks or months. And this is the brother who didn't tell me that I was and aunt until months after his son was miscarried. It's also rumoured he was a hit man for a gang. Do you think my family drama is enough? There's also my best friend Liam, he tried to quit smoking so now he vapes and he vapes to much. He often talks about how he won't live long and that if/when he dies possibly in the next year or so, then me and Will have to adopt his daughter.

I think that's all my problems right now, it really helped to write it all down so it's out of my mind. Thanks for being a listening ear. And if you want to write a story about my life, just let me know and I can give you more details! 😂