The voices in my head were yelling. I sat in the corner of my room, with my head in my arms. I tried to stop the voices but it was no use. I would never be able to get them out. I would never be able to stop them. I would never be able to win against them. That's because everything they said was true.
I know I wasn't supposed to, but the guilt was building up too much in my chest. I shouldn't have lied. I shouldn't have missed it. I deserve it. But... I promised him.
The cons outweighed the pros. I made a decision. I had to. I deserved all of this. Blood started to slowly drip down my arm and onto the floor. I stared at the first cut I had made in such a long time. The cut sent a mix of pleasure and pain. The pain soon became dull. I gripped my blade tightly, nearly cutting my hand. I wasn't hesitant anymore. I slashed another cut across my wrist. I didn't care if I accidentally cut a vein. I didn't care if I die. I deserve to disappear. The others deserve to live a happier life without me. I added another cut. Dark red blood stained the floor. It stained my clothes. I felt my eyes get wet. I felt a tear roll down my cheeks. I cursed. I didn't want to cry. I was done crying. But I couldn't control myself. More tears fell out.
SO USELESS.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU
JUST DIE.
THEY ALL HATE YOU.
I cried. My sobs began to grow louder and louder. Luckily, no one could hear. Woojin went to speak with our manager, while the rest went out to buy more groceries. I shivered. I picked up my blade and added new red cuts on my arms.
The pool of blood was huge. I stared at it. Starting to feel lightheaded, I tried to get up, but I fell back down.
SO WEAK.
HOW DID YOU EVEN MANAGE TO DEBUT?
More insults. More hatred. More tears. I hated myself so much. I held the blade to my neck. A cold shiver went down my spine. I was scared.
SUCH A COWARD.
I settled on cutting again. Bright red lines were littered all over my arms. I dug the blade in my skin once again. I sobbed even louder.
"Seungmin?"
My sight was blurry. I looked up.
"SEUNGMIN!"
~——~
Um.
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Alive? | Stray Kids | ✓
FanfictionCompleted (maybe editing) (the plot of this book isn't very creative so i'm not sure if you'd want to read this) Seungmin has fallen into depression after the death of Yang Jeongin. He developed the same habits that killed Jeongin. Alone at the caf...
