Steve Rogers Imagines

Infinity War

Sighing deeply I reload my gun, and walk back over to the shooting target. The training room was lit only by old crappy lights that hadn't been used since the 70s, the was no outside light at all. The perks of living in an old abandoned underground base. The only time I saw the actual outside world was when T'challa brought us new supplies or on the rare occasion we actually could go on a mission. Needless to say, I hated it here. I hated how no matter how hard I tried the smell of damp never went, I hated how rest and feeling clean was a luxury. How to have a warm shower I had to boil water on a small camping hob first. I hated how when I looked around at our broken team all I could see is misery. We started out with 8 people, but both Clint and Scott decided to take house arrest, nat was off somewhere in Russia half the time, Bucky was in Wakanda, wanda had left to go live with vision in Edinburgh. Leaving just me, steve and Sam for the majority of the time. I release the safety and hold the gun up, aiming for the target. Finger resting on the trigger, the feelings welling up inside me waiting for me to pull the trigger. I hated this base. Bang. I hated not being able to go home. Bang. I hate not being able to see my friends. Bang. I hate the accords. Bang. I hated that stupid fight. Bang. I hate zemo for everything he's done to us. Bang. My frustrations grew as each shot fired, I walk closer and closer to the target with every shot. I go to pull the trigger once more but I'm out of bullets. Frustrations reaching breaking point I scream out chucking the gun itself at the target. I look down at the floor breathing deeply trying to control my anger, I try and think of everything that makes me happy. I picture a date me and steve went on in central park, I imagine having a hot shower and crawling into my comfy bed at the compound after a long mission. I picture the team sat around a table laughing, on the verge of a food fight that was about to break out. I smile to myself for a nanosecond before ultimately realising none of those things could possible happen right now. I shake my head trying desperately to hold back the tears, I look back up and notice steve stood by the door in the corner of my eye. I turn to face him and see him looking back with the same expression I've seen for weeks, months even. "you okay?" he asks sighing, "yep" I sigh walking and picking up my gun. He doesn't respond but I could tell he knew I was lying, I glance back over and see him watching me. his normally bright blue eyes seemed dull, his beard and ragged long hair, which I once found incredibly good looking just looked dishevelled making me miss the old steve. I walk over to the ammunition table, debating whether to call it a day or reload and go again. "you didn't wear your ring again today" steve states, I look over at him with furrowed brows "pardon?" I ask confused. "your engagement ring you haven't worn it all week" he explains walking over to me, in all honesty I hadn't been wearing for more than a week now but he's just been too preoccupied to notice. I hold up my left hand and pretend to notice it for the first time "oh yeah, must have just forgotten, been a bit preoccupied recently" I lie shrugging my shoulders and forcing a small smile. "its okay, I know its been a bit tough lately and I'm sorry for all of this" steve signs leaning up against the table looking down at the floor. "sorry for what?" I ask this time actually confused, "this, the fight, the accords, having to go on the run, I single handedly tore the team apart for us to end up in this crappy base living in conditions none of us should have to put up with" he sighs crossing his arms and looking down at the floor. "you didn't single-handedly do this, we all played a part, zemo is to blame, we're all here because we support you" I say putting down my gun and moving so I was sat next to him. "do you wish we'd done what wanda and vision did? Pick somewhere to live in hiding" steve asks looking over at me, "in all honesty, yes" I admit making him look back down at the floor sadly "but I wouldn't be able to get my gun and shoot away my frustrations if I did that" I add making him smirk again. "I am sorry" he sighs putting an arm around me and pulling me closer to him "I know" I sigh "its okay" I add looking up at him and kissing him gently, smiling ever so slight at the sensation of his beard, I couldn't lie I did love the beard. "guys you need to come see this" a now blonde nat says walking towards us in a hurry. "when did you get back?" steve asks, "just now but look at this" she says passing steve a tablet. I see steve's face turn serious "fire up the jet now" he says.