Her Hater

Her Hater | 16

Lisa's Point of View

I want to walk away but I can’t.

My body’s also exhausted because of everything. I don’t know, maybe I’m just being sensitive and emotional as hell

He went on-stage. Our eyes met once again but I cut it off.

I have nothing to do with him. We’re clearly just here to perform this song.

The song just started after a while. I sighed even before dancing to it.

My goal is just to give my best. I need to look good to the other idols. I don’t want to be hated on again. It just hurts a lot.

We’re dancing to it finally and went hyped by the crowd. I saw my unnies cheering for me while raising their hands. I smiled.

“Go Lisa!”

“Go Bambam!”

“Go Jk!”

“Woah, I didn’t notice that 1997 idols dance so good!”

Other idols are also standing because they want to see us, I feel overwhelmed but at the same time I’m feeling triggered.

Wait, not here. Please. Don’t do anything shameful, Lisa. Please, just not here.

I was about to stop dancing and break down but I endured the trigger feeling of their eyes. I danced even more energetic and just looked at my unnies.

My feet is hurting. Damn.

Luckily the song is almost over. There’s just twenty seconds left.

When the song is finally over, I grabbed the chance to go to the seats in the corner of the stage.

No one can see me from the normal seats since there’s a big furniture that blocks the seats in here.

“Are you okay?”

I looked up to the one who said it.

Jungkook.

Out of all people, why does it have to be you? Argh.

I just ignored him and turned my sight on my feet.

“Does it hurt?” he asked.

He sat on the seat beside me. This is awkward.

“I’m fine..” I said while seriously looking at him. “You can go. You don’t need to worry about me.”

He gulped. I saw how he swallowed his saliva. “A-are you sure?”

I just nodded at him.

He slowly stood up and went away from me.

We’re not even close but he’s acting that we are. We’re not even in good terms but he’s acting like nothing happened. He’s not even good at me but he’s acting like he didn’t shade on me on my own account.

A few minutes had passed.

I’m quickly searching for Bambam. I need to see him. I need some ointment.

While I was scanning over the place from the seat I am still in, I was shocked when I saw who’s walking towards the stage once again.

And the heck, he’s about to go here!

He’s holding a little black bag.

“What are you doing here? I told you to leave me alone. I can handle.” I said.

He ignored me. He ignored the words I said to him. “Here, have some ointment. This is my own medicine and ointment bag.”

As much as I want to take it to easen up and lessen the pain, I don’t think I’ll take it.

“I don’t need it. Why do you even bring that thing in here?” I looked into his eyes.

He looked back at me. “Can you just please take it? Look, you’re even holding your foot since it’s hurting. And who told you to dance that song energetically while forcing your feet to do so?”

It seems like this place where idols meet and greet each other, is an empty place. The only thing I can hear is Jungkook talking.

“And you..”

“Who told you to care for me?” I asked.

He was stopped from moving. He’s just looking at me straight into my eyes.

“No one even asked you to help me. No one even asked for your help. I didn’t ask anything from you.” I added of.

Everything happened these past few days flashed into my head.

The hate.

The issue.

The racism.

The shade.

The blame for dancing not well enough because they don’t know my foot hurts.

Oh, I forgot. Idols can’t complain. So, I should’ve been sorry for it. Sorry for not being perfect.

I’m sorry to my own self for letting this destroy me. Sorry, Lisa.

I did my best but it wasn’t enough. I felt sorry for everything because of him.

“As much as you don’t want my existence.. And as much as everyone of you kept on hating at me..” I said. “I don’t want your existence too right near me. Go away, I don’t need your help.”

He was stopped and it felt like he’s just a statue listening to her thoughts and rants.

“S-sorry but–”

“Don’t ever explain anything. You don’t know what I have to go through because of your stupid comment.” I said while facing him and looking into his eyes.

“Oh, I almost forgot..”

“Thank you for making me experience hell but I hope you won’t target anyone again. I assure you, it’s scary.” I said while not realizing I already have tears in my both eyes.

I stood up and walked even though my right foot is hurting.

Although it hurts me physically, facing him was a scarier thing to do that can hurt me even more mentally and emotionally.