✔ The Casanova's Angel (Filipino Novel)

Kabanata 49

"What are you talking about?" I said with my hair out of place.

"Jusko Gelly." Nina said, putting her bag in my couch and placing her hands on her waist. "This is the first time I saw your place like this."

I rolled my eyes and sat on the couch. "Like what?"

"Like, like, like a nomad. Ano ba to, nakita mo ba yung mga hindi mo nahugasang plato? Kulang nalang magkakaroon ng ipis dito." She said while going around my apartment. "And have you seen the couch? Ano to basurahan?" Pinulot niya yung wrappers ng Cheetos on the couch. "And what the hell is this?" She said pointing at the empty bottles of beer. "You never drink beer."

"Well, I do now." I said nonchalantly.

She just looked at me with her eyebrows raised and that's when I noticed how big her stomach is. I breathed in and said, "Bakit ka andito?"

"like I said before, to knock some sense out of you."

"I don't mean to be rude Nina but I think we're not in terms to be taking care of each other after everything that's happened."

She took a deep breath and did something I was surprised with.

She cried.

"I'm a selfish person. I wanted things you had. I was jealous because you were living the life and I was someone I hated. I wasn't proud of who I am, of what I did, of my past. I loved someone I hurt because I wasn't contented and then I saw you. So happy. So contented with the littlest of things. And I wanted what you have. Akala ko kung meron ako nung kung anong meron ka, matutuwa ako. And lecheng buhay to, when I had Gerard, I was so happy. Finally, I had what you have. He saw me as someone better that you."

"Edi ayun, naging masaya ka naman. You're married, you're having a baby and here I am, naglalasing every night because I lost someone I loved." I said, laughing sarcastically.

"You don't get it. Angel. You're irreplaceable. Even after getting what I thought I wanted. Stealing from you, I regretted it afterwards. I became bitter because no matter what I did, I can see Gerard being affected by you every single time he sees you. And we both regretted it. We both lost someone we loved. You. And we realized it too late. Alam mo ba nasasaktan kami to see you like this."

"Like what? A failure?" I asked, crying.

"A failure? Tanga ka ba Angel? Anong failure duon? You're not a failure. You loved someone who loved you as well. And if he doesn't give you a chance then it's his fault. You did your best, you never gave up even when he treated you so bad. Pero ano ginagawa mo ngayon? You're starting to give up on yourself. And that's what hurt us the most."

"Nung linoloko niyo ko, I was like this. You didn't know because you were so happy with your life. Kaya pwede ba don't act like you care because in the first place, I was so broken because of you."

"And I know that. If I could turn back the time, I would. Pero hindi eh. We could only move forward. Live life. Move on. Do you think these bottles of beer help you?"

"Yes, it drowns my sorrow! Nakakalimutan ko lahat because I'm drunk. When I'm drunk, I fall asleep and everything is fine."

"And when you wake up?"

"I'll drink again."

"So ganito nalang palagi? Angel take control of your life. No one else will. Don't wait for someone to save you. You have to save yourself." She said, leaving an envelope on the table before going out.

When the door slammed shut, I looked around my apartment and saw what she was talking about.

It was a mess. I was a mess.

Pinunas ko ang mga luha sa pisngi ko at tinignan ang linagay niyang envelope.

You're cordially invited to Nickko and Amira's Wedding.