ʟɪꜰᴇ ꜱᴛᴜᴅɪᴇꜱ || ᴊ.ᴡʏ + ᴄ.ꜱ

Chapter 37

That got me angry.

"Be a real adult huh?! Ok--" I hit my fingers as I began listing, "I've been raising Soojin by myself since I was 18 years old, I bought a house for my family with saved up money from working three jobs at 19, I paid for my college education and never asked for a cent, I own my own building, I made a name for myself--I'm a psychologist, a famous and respected one! Look at all of my awards and certificates, " I pointed over to the dining room wall where every single accomplishment hung, along with Soojin's school awards. 

Our wall.

Hongjoong's eyes were flipping back and forth rapidly between me and my mom worriedly while Yunho and Mingi looked down at the counter, waiting for the awkwardness to subside.

And Wooyoung.

I couldn't tell what he was thinking as he watched me but his gaze made it easier to breathe and calm down.

"What I'm trying to say is....., I wouldn't change anything and I will never forget it because I'm proud of the life I worked for. But give me the credit I deserve."

She looked at me with her arms crossed. "Since you're an adult go fix things with your father."

Hongjoong hopped up off his chair along with Mingi and Yunho and they yelled goodbye to me as they hurried out of my apartment, knowing the conversation was going nowhere good.

"OMMA!! He walked away from me and now it's my job to fix it?" That logic made no sense to me.

"Your father was so upset! Everyone knew about your teenage pregnancy San, and that made him look like a failure--we never wanted that life for you!" She was raising her voice now as she tried to prove her point.

"He is a failure! He wasn't there for me! And he's definitely not there for you! You wanna know why? Because we're NOTHING TO HI--"

SLAP!  My eyes squeezed shut as my head hung after being hit. She knows everything and she slapped me, my mom slapped me. I couldn't believe it. 

The stinging I felt on my cheek brought back so many memories. 

I heard Wooyoung gasp.

My mom started crying and reached out to me but I went to Wooyoung instead and pulled him towards the door with one hand while the other cradled my face. 

I closed my apartment door and leaned against it, unable to look at Wooyoung now that we were alone. He saw too much.

"I...you..," I was having trouble snapping out of it and nothing I tried to say was making sense. I closed my eyes and took a minute to breathe. "Sorry, Wooyoung."

He pulled my head onto his shoulder and petted the back of my head while I pulled myself together. My hand was still holding my cheek that seemed to hurt even more than I remembered. 

Pulling myself away, I finally dropped my hand and let my gaze drop with it, still unable to look at him. "You should get home...I'll call you tomorrow," I said and turned to go back inside.

"You can come with me. Come stay with me tonight." He must be worrying.

With my hand on the door handle, I kept my eyes there as I answered. "Wooyoung, I can't just leave and run away. I'm a parent. No matter how I feel or what I'm going through, I'm Soojin's parent. I can't just leave her here with my mom. That responsibility never goes away."

"You're right...you're a really good person San...and a great dad." Wooyoung's voice was soft as I felt him wrap his arms around me from behind and lay his head on my shoulder. "Call me if you need me okay?"