Girl Meets the Mind of a Genius

Genius Meets Breakups

Farkle (con)

This is what I've been waiting to do for 11 years.

The kiss is so small and it doesn't last long. 

We both pull away for one second to breathe.

I don't think either of us was ready for that to happen. I think we're both in shock. 

But we both go right back in again. 

I'm not going to pretend like Smackle and I had the most physical relationship. We didn't really. And that was okay.

But I've never felt a physical connection, not like this. 

Riley scooches herself closer to me and I put my arms around her waist.

I never want to let her go. I don't want this moment to end.

But I can't forget what I said. I can't forget what I have to do. I have to do it for her.

It takes all of the strength I have to stop and pull away.

"Riley, we can't."

"Farkle, I love you."

She leans in again but I back away.

"Riley, please." I beg. 

"Why not, Farkle? Don't you love me?"

"Of course I do."

"Then what are you so afraid of?"

I feel my heart pounding, "I'm not enough for you! Don't you see that?"

For a second, Riley and I just stare at each other. 

She's processing what I said and I'm processing why I even said it in the first place. 

Riley reaches out her hand, "Farkle, I've always loved you. It's always been us, we just haven't had the courage to admit it. The whole thing with Lucas was nothing."

I shake my head, "Riley, you were in love with him the moment Maya pushed you onto his lap in the subway. You've been five years in the making."

"We're different now," she looks down, "He and I grew apart. We've all changed. And I've realized how I feel about you. His stunt on the roof didn't change that."

"If Lucas appearing on the roof truly didn't mean anything, we wouldn't be having this conversation." I take a deep breath, "You would have found me that night and told me that you love me. We would be together."

"But I'm telling you now. Of course I was overwhelmed by Lucas on the roof, who wouldn't be? I was feeling so much in that moment and Lucas came in and made it messy." 

She reaches out to me, but I back away.

Riley holds up her hands in defense, "Farkle, you have to understand, he was my first boyfriend. He and I will always have some sort of connection."

"So then go back to Lucas. You've loved him this entire time."

"But you and I have been together since we were kids. You are Gatsby, Farkle."

"Riley, Gatsby dies."

Her face goes blank, "I didn't know that."

"I don't really want to die."

"That's not the point, genius. The point is that you are the love I've always had. Why are you letting Lucas ruin that? Why is he getting to you so much?"

I shake my head, "Because he's the guy you end up with. He's the dreamboat destiny that people yearn for. I'm the background character who helps you get to where you should be."

Riley reaches out for my hands but I pull them back, "Farkle, this isn't you. Your spirit is crushed."

I feel my heart breaking, "You don't know who you love or how you feel. But somewhere deep inside, you know that I'm not good enough for you, and I never will be."

"Riley, I need you to be honest with me."

"Of course."

"Did you feel anything when you kissed Lucas? Anything at all?"

Riley's eyes widen. She's fighting back what she wants to say.

"Riley, it's okay. You need to be honest with me."

She bites her lip and I can see her tearing up.

"Please, Riley."

She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes, "Yes."

"Then I think we've come to a conclusion." I look down to hide my face.

I don't want her to see me upset.

"But I feel more when I'm with you. I love you," Riley says desperately.

My chest hurts. I think my heart is actually breaking.

"But you still feel something while with him, and that matters more than anything else. It's like I said, you'll always wish you would've found out what being with him was like. Be with him."

"But-"

I stand up and look down at her, "And if we're meant to be, it'll happen."

I start walking towards her bedroom door to leave.

"Wait, Farkle, please stop."

Riley runs up behind me and grabs my hand before I can open the door.

I turn around and she immediately wraps her arms around my shoulders to hug me.

I can feel myself getting anxious. I want to cry.

"I love you, Farkle."

"And I love you."

She leans back and looks down at my lips.

I know if I kiss her, there's no going back. I can't do that to myself.

I lean over to kiss her on the forehead.

I pull away from the hug.

I turn around.

I open her bedroom door.

And I leave.

A/N

I couldn't make it that easy