Chess Pieces #5: Loki Von Amstel

Chapter 3

My father fell ill with some disease that destroys and weakens his immune system. He looked so pale and thin and looked like he has aged fifty years than his age now. I don't know what disease he has, though. I didn't bother knowing it.

He didn't want to be admitted in the hospital so he just stayed at home while his condition is getting worse with each passing day. 'Cause he said that he doesn't want people to think that he is weak. Hindi ko din naman sya pinilit na magpa-hospital. What for? To him, his pride more important than his life.

I didn't know what to feel now that I have a dying father. Alter, Yucca, Sieg and Enkidu looked like they are worried and were just waiting for me to broke down and cry. Should I do that, then? Does a child really required to cry and mourn for their parents? Hindi ba pwede ang katulad ko na wala man lang nararamdaman kahit na pagkaawa?

And to be honest, I felt happy instead.

"Is that for my father?" I asked Sieg one time when I saw him holding a tray with food. It was only a soup and some fruits. He was about to go upstairs when I called him.

"Yes, Your Majesty." he answered.

"Let me." I said. But before I could take the food tray from him, Enkidu stopped me and took the tray from Sieg, instead.

"I'll carry it till we reached his room."

I just nodded and didn't make any arguments with him. I don't want having a hard time carrying the food tray while climbing the stairs. It's just a waste of my efforts and energy.

Enkidu carried the food tray as he followed me towards my father's room. We both stopped in front of his room's door. I looked at Enkidu and motioned him to give me the tray.

"Sasamahan kita." he said. I can see the worries in his eyes that quickly disappeared because he knew that I don't need it. And I don't want anyone to be worried about me.

I am strong. I can take care of myself. They are just wasting their time by being worried towards a person who can handle herself.

I looked at Enkidu and smirked.

"My father is invalid, Enkidu. He can't do anything to me." I took the food tray from him. "He's useless now."

Enkidu sighed and opened the door for me. I wrinkled my nose when I noticed the disgusting smell that was surely coming out from the old man who was lying on his bed. I went near him and put down the food tray on his bedside table.

I stared at him for a couple of minutes. His eyes were closed but I can see the movements of his eyeballs behind his lids. He's awake. He knew that I am here but he didn't bother opening his eyes.

I looked at him from head to toe. He is so thin that he almost looked like a skeleton. Anyone could tell that he will die at any minute now. Hindi na nya kaya pang labanan ang sakit nya.

The side of my lips rose. I can't believe the day will come that I'll be able to witness him being like this. So weak and dying.

The proud man can't do anything against his disease, huh? Funny...

He always told me that I should be like him. I should surpassed his strength. That I should forget that I am a woman and stop crying everytime I felt hurt. That I should act like nobody or nothing could ever destroy me.

But I guess, I failed. 'Cause he's still mad at me. He's still angry that I was born as a woman.

"Here's your food." I said.

His eyes slowly opened. He stared at the ceiling first, blinking numerous times, before he found me who was standing beside his bed and looking down on him.