Here's an update for you guys. So enjoy. ❤️
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"OK but please tell me why" he said that just an inched near my face and I gulped and I turned away.
"Just go kai" and I could feel that my heart was breaking into a million pieces.
Though my palms were swollen and burnt, I held so tightly. This heartbreak feels cold. It feels like drying concrete in my chest. Heart break is a funny thing. We all know that will happen, but we are never ready for it. I underestimate it's power. It's like handing a gun to a murder and hoping not to be killed.
"OK but..." he pushed our faces inches apart against the wall...Please tell me why I need to go, Hana?"While he looked into my eyes. My hands are shaking in nervousness and also sweating a bit.
" Um... "words are not coming out. As I tried to looked away again. I kept it a secret not because I hate you, I kept it because I don't want you to get hurt by me. If you knew you would not listen to me. I held my head down facing the face not wanting to looked into his sparkling eyes of his again.
" Tell me why "Kai said again and now our faces are really close with his serious look on his face.
" If not I will kiss you"he said with no hesitations.
"Go a head then kiss me I don't care" I replied but deep down I do care. I don't mind he kiss me but what if he did something that I regret later.
"If I kiss you right now, I won't be able to stop"he exclaimed and his eyes soften a bit.
He tilted my head to make me face him with his intense eyes of his" Please just tell me why, Hana you said it yourself, we will never keep secrets from each other again, please tell me... I won't force a kiss on you without your permission I am not that kind of guy... Please tell me why I will listen to what you will say I promise... I really love you Hana... I really do" he grabbed one of my hands and held it gently to make me feel comfortable to speak to him.
"Are you sure. I know for sure you would not obey my words at all I know you Kai. If I told you to do the opposite what you want... You will continue doing things of what you wanted to do I will tell you when I feel it's the right time sorry Kai,I really am... Please forgive me... If I say something to you tomorrow that might break your heart, I'm sorry in advance. This is hard for me as it is for you. you really need to go, I promise I tell you later" I pushed him to the front door and throw his leather black jacket to him and he caught it and said my goodbye with a fake smile on my face. He has a confused looked plastered on his face as he walked through my front gate. Half way he turned his head back at me trying to say something but I shut the door before he could say anything.
I gasped while leaning my back against the front door. Thinking of what should I do as I was sitting on the hard floor back against the door hugging my legs. As I was thinking of it. My eyes begin to become watery.
"Why it's always have to be me... Why the world hates me so much..." I held down my head while sobbing.
As hard as I tried to keep it back, the agony back the form of a silent scream poured out from my throat like an uproar. The water beads started dropping one after another, with no sign of stopping. I punched the wall and tried to scream but the sound of the place melted my throat. The muffled sobs were wracking my throat. The world became a blur, and so did all of the sounds. The flavor of it. The smell of it. Everything went missing. The last painful emotion slammed on her before I lost feeling.
It was more than crying, it was the kind of sobbing desperate that comes from a person exhausted of all hope. At the tiny grave, I sank to my knees, not caring for the wetness on my shirt. Emotions swirled with the ice water surrounding the cold metal drain, as fire streaks burned his cheeks. Every new wave shook a hot trail of agony in every rake of emotion through my frame. Tears running down my face, like the water flowing through the drains.
Rubbing salt inside my wounds.
I felt like I want to stay in an empty room with no one but me alone and I want to shut everyone all around me. I felt empty emotionally and physically because of what I saw. Why the universe hates me so much.
"Why must I have this ability.... Why must I have this disease... Why me... Out of all the people in this world why me... Sometime I question myself why my life is always this unlucky... 3 months left before I die... Just the thought of that scared me.." tears fell again to my cheeks and my face is so ugly right now if anyone looks at me I just know it they will say the same.
"Why was I the one who gains my time from Kai when I'm close to him. I was selfish about it. Firstly, I shouldn't do that. I hate to do so myself. But why did I never see this before I decided to come close to him ...Let alone my appearance reduces the span of Kai's times. Now because of me I will make his life shorter then it supposed to be. I don't want to see that happening" I held my head down on my knees and I hugged my legs tightly.
I run up the stairs, crushed on my bed and covered myself with a blanket to feel as if I am shouting people away from me. I do not want to feel the heart ache. But it was still there as I put my hand on my chest.
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What will happen next? Stay tune to find out. Vote and comment it means a lot.
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Time | Exo Kai
Fanfiction[Completed ] (Book 4 in my Exo series spinoff to phone switch) Have you ever felt like you hate something so bad that you want to get rid of it? That something is a so call gift as people say it. I don't want to say that's a gift but more as a nigh...
