Someone That I left Behind

Pray

P'Mhee

Am I doing the right thing?

I managed to convince the production team to go to Chiang Mai.

I was torn between Joong and Nine.

I promised Nine that I'd kept whatever that was being said that night to myself.

But, Joong lost his happy self for all these years. Wasn't that a punishment enough.

From the start, I knew their chemistry went beyond the reel.

They included each other in their real life as well.

From a manager point of view, this was disaster waiting to happen should anything went wrong between them.

But, I couldn't tell them not to be together. Fans liked them together. It's good for business. Their events sold out here and there. Sponsorships were flooding. Endorsements kicked in. Their social media lives were always talked about, usually actors doing it to show they were friends and close, but they were really close and did it together in the same place most of the time.

Questions about their status were always thrown by fans, in a joking way. Both of them knew the limit, gave answers that satisfied the fans but also kept them guessing as well. Wasn't that what fanservice was about?

So, I let them be. I kept my innermost fear that something had happened. I was older and I could see that. But I also realized, that they themselves didn't aware of what was happening between them. Joong had admitted to never be in love, Nine was in nature a caring person, so these might confuse them a lot, the line of friendship, brotherhood, family and..love. I saw but I kept my mouth shut. If nobody disturbed the pandora box, no calamity would happen.

Until the night Nine came to me broken.

I remembered holding a tired Nine. That listless small body, who was usually very calm and matured in any situation, was shaking violently and couldn't hold his sorrow, tears flooding my shoulder.

At that moment I knew, that disaster had happened.

I wanted to blame myself for ignoring my conscience once.

So, this time, I follow what I felt was right.

Maybe this time, fate be kind to them one more time, let them find each other again.

All I wished for, more than anything, to see the dark clouds that shrouded their hearts be gone and may the light once again shine from both their eyes.

For that alone, I prayed so hard.