Addiction~Prinxiety

37

Several days went by and nobody really said anything. They all acted the same... well, Virgil did. Roman hardly ever saw anyone and he always seemed to just vanish at the end of the day. Virgil would just stand there by the steps every night right after diner and watch Roman walk right out the door without fail before leaving to go crawl into bed and cry. He never did give back his storm cloud necklace. He had that just hanging on the wall, another piece of art Roman had given him. His entire fucking room sent him spiraling. How was he supposed to sleep in there when everything reminded him of that stupid prince.

Today was no different. Virgil had spent all morning in his room trying to avoid as many people as he could before going out for lunch and pretending as if his heart was torn through the fucking shitter. Yes, he was aware he had done it to himself. It didn't make it hurt any less. Then come dinner and he was forced to face the prince as they sat around the table making idle chit chat... all though Roman never looked up at him and neither one ever spoke. Today though... Today Roman didn't come.

"Hey, kiddo?" Virgil frowned as Patton placed a plate down in Roman's spot, glancing around at everyone. "Do you think you can go get Roman for dinner? He must be lost daydreaming again."

"Do I have to?" Everyone other the Janus froze up as Virgil's voice shook. "He probably just lost track of time. He'll be down soon. Besides... Roman and I... we're sort of not... We're not speaking." Logan and Remus both jumped up in shock making Virgil glare over at the two. "What?"

"What happened? You two were dating..."

"You and Roman are dating?" Patton squealed with joy, cutting Logan off only for Virgil to slam his hands down scaring everyone.

"No. We aren't. Not anymore. I broke up with him a few weeks ago." The room slowly crashed as Logan paled.

"Shit." Remus was clearly filled with anxiety as Logan just shook his head. "You stay, Ray. I'll go talk to him. Patton, he might not be eating with us today."

"And why's that?" Logan's eyes darkened as Virgil visibly crashed. 

"It's their anniversary." Virgil just sat there sipping his drink with shaky hands as Logan left. He should have known something was wrong. He had been so focused on his own boyfriend as of late he didn't even care to notice the extreme change in Roman's routine. "Roman?"

"I'm not eating." Logan sighed as he carefully opened the door to find Roman out on his balcony. He was still wearing that lose fitted black shirt and jeans he's had on since yesterday. 

"I figured." Logan slowly made his way over to him to see Roman clutching a picture in his hand as he held a lit cigarette in his other. "Those things will kill you."

"I'm already dead inside, what's the point if my body goes to."

"Roman..."

"Don't bother." Roman took a deep breath of his cigarette letting the smoke fill the evening air. You could tell just how broken he was. His hair was a mess. His eyes were dull lifeless and sunken in. He looked sick with dark circles around his eyes. He didn't even look like he eats anything but Logan knew he at least ate dinner... just not enough of it. "I should have told him."

"About?"

"My hypersexuality." Logan's eyes went wide as Roman just laughed taking another drag of his cigarette. "I should have told him."

"Is that why he..." Roman nodded letting his arms hand over the railing as his dead eyes just took in the sight. Logan could see how tightly he was holding the picture. It was enough to make his hands go white but he didn't even pass it a single glance. 

"I thought I was cheating on him, Lo. And then dared to compare me to this... asshole from his past. I love him and he left me."

"Ro..."

"I should get ready." Roman took one last puff before flicking his cigarette away from him and watching it disappear below. "I'm going out tonight." He tossed the picture onto the bed as he started for his bathroom.

"The one place called." Roman froze eyes instantly tearing up as Logan frowned over the immense pain his friend was in. "They wanted to know if you were coming back to get that... thing you had them make. They said they've been trying to reach you but..."

"I never picked up." Logan watched as Roman opened his bathroom door and just leaned against the sink. "I didn't want to even think about it, Lo. What's the point? Virgil left me. He left me. If I go and get it then I'm stuck with a reminder of everything I wanted but now can't have."

"You could try."

"AND DO WHAT, LOGAN?!" Logan flinched at the sudden tone as his eyes went wide. "Beg him to take me back? Tell him how much I love him and need him? How I'm nothing without him? How the ONLY thing I can actually feel anymore is this gut-wrenching pain and sadness, otherwise I'm just numb without him? Logan, you were there with me. You know EXACTLY how far I was planning to take this. You know what he means to me and now he's gone."

"He's not gone, Roman. He's right downstairs." Roman rolled his eyes as he stripped his shirt off and washed him up a bit as Logan groaned. "Roman, you can't be serious about going out. This is EXACTLY what got you in this mess. Finding love in others..."

"I'm not looking for love, Logan." Roman walked back out, hair tousled and soaked, as he just glared at the other. "I'm just looking to feel. Something... ANYTHING other than this never-ending pain or numbness. I just want to feel." Roman yanked a shirt out his draw never one thinking to change his pants as he pulled it on and scoffed. "And you have no right to tell me how to cope with anything."

"Just remember, Roman... The man you love so much... is downstairs WATCHING you leave every night." Roman frowned as Logan just shook his head. "You're only proving him right, you know. I thought you of all people would have fought." Logan suddenly fell as Roman punched him square in the face seething.

"Fuck. You." Logan's eyes went wide as he fixed his glasses wincing at the throb in his cheek. Roman was not by any means weak. "You fucking dare you. YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HE MEANS TO ME, GOD DAMN IT! He is literally my everything. He's the reason the sun sets and stars shine. He's the reason my world moves. He's the reason I get up in the morning... or the reason I can breathe. My heart ONLY beats because of him. I love him so fucking much that its torture. SO don't you DARE tell me I should have fought. I would give everything... do anything for that man... and I lost him. My world has no more fucking color anymore. I'm literally dead. So shut the fuck up and leave me alone." Roman stormed out of the room right passed Janus, who had clearly heard everything. 

"Roman, wait..." Janus just stopped seeing the man quickly run off leaving him to help Logan who was still just sitting there stunned.

"Roman?" The only one that could stop him was Virgil. Roman froze on the spot seeing Virgil just standing there in front of the door. "You're going out again?"

"What does it matter?" Virgil flinched as Roman growled. The smaller just watched as Roman grabbed his jacket and glared over at him seeing as he was blocking the door. "Are you going to move, or what?"

"I'm just worried about you, Ro?"

"Well, stop worrying, Count Woalof." Virgil's eyes went wide as Roman's narrowed. "You're the one that broke up with me. You made that choice... what I do now is not the concern of Jack smellington. So move!" Virgil only nodded as Roman rolled his eyes. "Thank the gods. JDelightful actually listened to me this time."

"Roman..."

"Don't." Roman was out the door before Virgil could get one more word in. 

"So we're back to the asshole Roman again." Virgil smiled with a broken expression slowly but surely making his way back to his room. "It's my fault."