I sit in bed and look into the things my lawyer suggested. I hear the bedroom door creak open and I see Blake peer around the corner eyeing me. I close my laptop and hold out my arms, "Come here bubbie." I tell him.
His little feet pad across the wooden floor and he jumps onto bed curling up next to me. I play with his hair for a bit until he speaks up, "Did you really mean it when you would take me to see mommy, even if it was late?" he asks in a near whisper.
"Of course I meant it." I tell him, continuing to absentmindedly play with his hair.
He looks up at me, "Can we go see mommy?"
I brush my hand against his cheek. "Of course we can bubbie. Go put your shoes on." I tell him and he toddles off to grab his Velcro shoes.
I sit up before pulling a hoodie on over my head and throwing my hair up in a bun. Blake comes running back in, ready to go. I grab a backpack and shove the necessities inside before grabbing my keys and shoving my phone in my pocket.
The drive to the hospital is quiet. I'm not used to Blake being so, silent. When we get out of the car Blake grabs my hand, and we walk through the halls of the hospital stopping when we reach Hayden's room. I pick Blake up and set him in her bed so he can be close to her.
I give him a kiss on the forehead. "Talk to her bubbie, she might be able to hear you."
"About what?" he asks as he snuggles into her body.
"Anything you want. I'll be just outside the door." I tell him before shutting the door behind me. I wanted to give him his own uninterrupted time with Hayden.
I'm not really sure how long I was sitting in the hallway before I heard the alarms going off. Five... maybe ten minutes. I rushed into the room just behind the doctors, scooping Blake up and taking him out in the hallway, removing him from the situation. He doesn't need to be traumatized further by witnessing whatever, that, was. From the quick glance I got, I could have sworn I saw Hayden's bloodshot eyes were open. Maybe I'm just imagining things.
"She's awake and physically responsive." someone says behind me. I turn around and see that it's Mac. "Not sure of the severity or extent of her injuries or her cognitive function... but whatever woke her up started a fire. She's NOT happy to say the least." she warns me.
I kneel down and look Blake in the eyes, "Blake what did you tell mommy?" I ask him, but he just shakes his head letting me know he won't tell me. I can't force him to, so I just nod and pull him in for a hug. "You're not in trouble bubbie, you did good. Do you wanna see her now that she's awake?" I say, spewing the first thing that comes to mind. Blake nods yes, so I pick him up and go back into her room.
I've seen Hayden angry but I've never seen her fuming like she is right now. "It's good to see you awake... honestly, I'm kind of terrified of you right now." I admit to her and she just rolls her eyes and motions for me to come closer, so I do.
She scoots over in her bed and pats the spot next to her. I assume she wants Blake close to her so I set him down and she pulls him close, giving him a kiss on the forehead. I turn to sit in the chair next to her bed and she grabs my wrist and gives me a pleading look. Like she's afraid that I'm going to run away while she's asleep.
"Hayden, I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here when you wake up." I explain to her. Her expression softens before she closes her eyes and snuggles with her son.
I probably should have taken into consideration to bring Hayden's meds with me.
She's been without them for over a week now.
When I open my eyes all I can see is Blake trying to get her attention as she lays on her side facing away from him.
"Come on bubbie, lets let mommy rest." I say getting ready to pick him up.
"Leave him." she finally speaks up not bothering to turn over. So I let him be and sit back in the chair with my head propped against the palm of my hand.
~~~~
*Hayden's POV*
People oftentimes think I'm stoic because I don't let my emotions show. I rarely cry. I honestly don't remember the last time I smiled. But that's the thing, it's not because I don't have emotions or don't feel anything. I actually feel things very deeply and sometimes I don't know how to process my emotions that hold so much intensity.
I want to be happy that my son is alright. I want to be happy that Billie is here. All that's on my mind is the fact that my mother smacked my son in the mouth just because he asked one too many times to see me.
I'm sad because I couldn't protect my son.
I'm angry because, how could someone do that to a defenseless child.
I'm hopeless because I see a difference in his countenance.
I'm hurting for him, he didn't deserve that.
It's one thing to emotionally abuse me, I can handle it. It's completely different to abuse my son. I can feel the rage bubbling up inside of me, it's beginning to be to much to bear. I sit up and rip out the IV from my arm, ignoring the blood seeping down my arm. I stand and attempt to walk, only to be met with the fact that I'm too weak to do much of anything and collapse to the floor.
Billie rushes to my side to help me up. "Don't." I order and she lets me go.
I grab the bed rail and pull myself up just enough to sit on the edge of the bed. I look down to see not only my bloody arm, but my stomach is oozing blood too. Fuck.
I told you I'd kill you.
Looks like I need to try harder.
Your son doesn't deserve you.
Take care of yourself.
Let Billie in.
She can help.
Pill.
Pill.
Pill.
You couldn't protect him.
Jackie hurt him.
You let it happen.
The voices grow louder and the pain behind my eyes is searing I grip my hair and let out a groan trying to stifle the ear wrenching scream that I want to let out.
I need to control myself.
I need Layla.
a/n: what do we think is gonna go down?
do we want #justiceforblake?
Anywho, I love you bubbies!! 💕🥰
