Hayden had another seizure. Which called for emergency surgery.
Hour 1
Is the surgery almost over? I check my watch, it's been five fucking minutes... she's probably still in prep. Wonder what they do in prep? Is Hayden okay?
"Surgery make you nervous?" Alan speaks up as he lazily crosses his arms over his chest.
"I guess it does." I look next to me and see that Blake is peering over the coloring book in front of him every once in awhile and studying Alan's face.
"Well it seems like we don't know much about each other, since I'm going to be staying with you for awhile, why don't you ask me some questions." he presses. "I can even ask you some too. Even though Hays talks about you often she's still pretty reserved."
I furrow my brow and think for a moment, "Alright, why did you marry Hayden's cunt of a mom? How did you meet such a horrible woman?"
Alan lets out a hearty laugh, "Well to be fair she wasn't always like that... she used to be fun and easy going, then she ended up getting pregnant. I don't think she wanted children, but ended up with two. I married her because I thought at the time it was the right thing to do. To be honest I'd do it all over again just to have Hays. She's a good kid, deserves a lot better than what life has dealt her." he explains visibly frustrated with himself, but his expression changes quickly.
"So how did you and my daughter meet?" he asks with a smirk.
I roll my eyes slightly. "Where do I start? Uh, well I met her ages ago at this restaurant she was working at. I hit on her and she had the audacity to think that I was on a date with my brother." I say trailing off shifting in my seat. "So do you have any regrets?" I ask him.
He ponders the question for a moment. "I could say I regret not taking Parker and Hays with me when I got the job in Galveston. They deserved to have my around more often... maybe if I had been there Parker would would be too." he confesses.
Hearing the weight of guilt that his words carry nearly breaks my heart. He blames himself for his daughters death, another thing he and Hayden have in common.
"So it's obvious Blake isn't yours, I know about Layla. Why stick around?" he questions with a glare. He knows this is a loaded question and he's got me back in a corner.
I look at the little man coloring beside me."I'm sticking around because I love him." I say with a smile.
"You love him, but you don't love my daughter?" he raises a brow and props his head against the palm of his hand.
"I never said I didn't love Hayden. I do love her, I'm just taking my time falling in love with her. I don't want to rush and say something without fully meaning it. I can tell her I love her and mean it, but it's a different thing to be in love with someone and genuinely mean it. Besides I thought it was my turn for a question." I say with a small smile.
He places his free hand over his heart. "My apologies miss. Hit me with your best shot." he challenges.
Before I can ask him anything, Blake crawls into my lap and whispers in my ear. "Bee, I'm hungry."
"Ok bubbie we'll get some food." I whisper back. "Sorry to cut this short Alan but I need to get him some food. Did you want me to bring you back anything?"
He holds up a hand and shakes his head, "I'm alright, thank you."
Hour 2
Bubbie is sitting across from me happily snacking away on his chicken nuggies. I can't help but watch him and smile. I miss the days when I was a kid, when life was simple, and things were innocent. I hope I'm doing right by Blake.
"Do you want one?" he says holding out his last nugget to me.
"No bubbie, I'm good with my water." I tell him with a smile. Honestly, if I were to eat I'm pretty sure I'd throw it back up. My nerves are nearly shot waiting on any news from the nurses.
Once Blake finishes his lunch, I take him outside to run around for a bit. Kids need fresh air right?
Hour 3
"That was a hell of a lunch break." Alan jokes.
"Yeah I took him outside for a bit just to run around and be a kid." I explain, not in the mood to smile.
He chuckles, "I'm just giving you shit. Sorry. Oh, by the way, a nurse stopped by and said Hayden should be done within the next hour. Said she's doing good." he says tugging on the laces of his muddied work boots. Must be a nervous habit of his.
"Does surgery makes you nervous?" I ask him.
"Yeah it does... my brother had surgery to remove his tonsils when we were kids, ended up getting a secondary systemic infection, never woke up. I try not to show my emotions though, cover it up by distracting myself." he confesses.
"Why not?" I press him further.
He runs his fingers through his hair. "Oh, I don't know..."
Damn he's more reserved than Hayden is. Before I can get another word out of my mouth a nurse speaks up. "Mr. Grey?"
Alan stands and gives her his attention. "So Hayden is out of surgery and in recovery. She's not awake just yet but I will take you back to see her. Once Dr. Jackson can assess where she's at, you'll receive more instructions on her rehab and physical therapy." she says and guides him toward recovery. I start to follow, "I'm sorry Miss, only family is allowed in recovery."
"That's fine." I say with a disappointed smile.
"I can take Blake back with me if you want." Alan offers.
I kneel down in front of Blake. "I- bubbie do you want to see mommy?" I ask and he nods yes.
"Ok, well he can take you to see her. I'm not allowed to see her just yet." I explain and he wraps his arms around my neck and refuses to let go.
I hold him close.
All I can do, right now, in this moment, is keep him safe.
a/n: that moment when you have so much stuff to do and you decide to write instead. 😬
how are we feeling s our Hayden's dad?
I LOVE YOU BUBBIES!!!!!!!!!! 💗💗
