Destiny & Distance

98°

—Babe -I hear Chris mumble, but I decide to ignore him-

Almost instantly, he calls me again. I internally feel like rolling my eyes, he knows I've been having trouble sleeping and now he wakes me up in the middle of the night?

—Christopher, I'm trying to sleep here. I'm tired -I say stiff-

—I know, but... -he hesitates before continuing- did you pee?

As he asks that, I open my eyes, feeling deeply ashamed.

—I, no... No that I know of, but it might've happened -I start checking the bedspread and in fact, they're wet- fuck me -I growl, carefully trying to stand up. Chris turns on the lights-

When my feet touch the ground, I feel a cascade coming down my legs. I widen my eyes like plates, worryingly looking at Chris -who probably has the same face as me-

—Chris, I think it's time to go -I look down again at my legs and the mess I made on the floor-

He quickly stands up and walks back and forth, not knowing what to do. I stare at him as he tries to calm himself down, he looks back at me with a worried expression.

—Should I get you to the bathroom, clean the floor or we should get going? -he asks with shaky hands-

—Go get my mom. -I say and he runs out of the room-

In less than a two minutes, they both are back in the room while I'm still standing there. My mom looks at me and also widens her eyes.

—Ay, mi amor. Ya viene tu bebé -she assures me my baby's coming- do you feel any pain? -I shake my head- okay, well, we still gotta go

—I'm going to call my mom as well -Chris says and I nod at him-

My mom walks to me and we go to the bathroom, where she helps me get cleaned and change the pyjama. Once I'm ready and back on the bedroom, Chris' already cleaning up the mess I made.

—Did she answer? -I ask him-

—She's getting ready. We'll meet at the hospital -he tells me- if you want to, go change and I'll quickly change right here -he says to my mom, she limits to nodding and leaving the room- are you feeling alright? -Chris asks as he takes some pants out of his closet-

—Yeah, I don't feel any pain. I'm just anxious and nervous. What time is it? -I ask him-

—It's 3AM -he tells me as he changes his shorts to blue jeans, he grabs a sweater and a The North Face navy cap- I'm gonna get you a sweater and a jacket -he looks through his wardrobe and I just sit there, on the edge of the bed looking at how nervous he is-

—I'm gonna be honest with you, all I want to do is for you to cuddle me and go back to sleep -I say, yawning-

—You're still sleepy? -I nod- I feel like I just had 6 redbulls, 5 cups of coffee and probably a line of coke -he jokes, making me laugh- seriously -he giggles- Ohhh, I love you—I can't believe it's happening already -he walks to me and carefully hugs me, as if I'm made of crystal. Then, he kisses me on the lips-

—I love you more -I say to him, feeling deeply in love- are you excited? -I ask the obvious-

—Are you seriously asking me that? I don't even know how to act, I feel like jogging to Russia thanks to the adrenaline. -he says amusingly- do you want me to get you anything? -I shake my head, but then I remember-

—Can you look for my phone? Or yours. I just want Sara and my dad to know we're headed to the hospital -I say to him-

It takes no time for us to do everything we had to and leave the house. When we arrived, Lisa was already there waiting for us, as soon as she sees Chris, she hugs him—she's clearly nervous and excited as well. I get admitted and a doctor comes to us, asking tons of questions.

—Okay, let's just point it out again. You broke water about an hour ago and still aren't feeling any contraction?

—That's right -I say to my doctor-

I'm in the hospital room with Chris standing beside me, holding my hand and our moms sitting on the couch, paying full attention to my interactions with the doctor.

—Alright. This is common in some women but it's just a matter of time until you start experiencing contractions, there'll be a nurse checking in on you every 30 minutes just to see if there's any pain yet. Once you start having contractions, this process called dilatation will begin, your cervix will open allowing us to get bring your baby into the world -he carefully explains, making sure I'm understanding everything- we'll need you to have a 10cm dilatation in order to have your baby through vaginal birth, if you don't dilate, we'll get you to the O.R for a C-Section. As far as I know, many women feat the C-Section, but it's an easy, quickly and safe procedure. Do you have any questions?

I hesitate before opening my mouth. I am still processing the information he just gave me and feeling two times anxious as I imagine the feeling of everything he just mentioned.

—Yeah, uh, since her water broke about an hour ago -Chris sheepishly speaks up- is it safe for the her and the baby to wait more hours?

—A dad who actually participates, I like that -the doctor smiles at him- it is safe for her and the baby. Babies can patiently wait in the womb, without amniotic fluid, for up to 48hrs. Some birth labors take longer than others, and since it's her first baby, we don't have any record on her, so we'll wait. -he finishes with a wide smile- any other question?

—I think that'll do -I say, still tangled with the information-

I don't know if it's because I'm nervous, but I've read online about this a hundred times trying to prepare myself psychologically for this and now that the day has come, I'm blank.

—Okay, feel free to call me if you need anything or if you have any other question. -he politely says before leaving the room-

—I'm sleepy -I say as I close my eyes- I really want to get this over with. I want to sleep all night and day.

—Go back to sleep, babe -Chris motions me to- we won't go anywhere else

I smile with my eyes closed at his comment, but still decide it is my opportunity to go back to sleep. I mean, there's so much more that I can do but it's your call, daughter. I'm just here, waiting for you.