Duel of the fates

Chapter 33

Obiwans POV:

I watch over Calypsos recovery. I want to force heal her arm, but when I asked the councils permission to do so they refused, insisting she needed to heal naturally and become stronger through her limitations.

I observe her and teach her how to fight effectively with one saber and with her non-dominant hand. She was, however, distracted by Anakin constantly. Because I tried to always be around Calypso to help her stay focused, Anakin spent his time with Padmé in the weeks she stayed in Mandalore to recover. However this seemed to distract Cal more, making her fight aggressively and without technique.

When Padmé had fully recovered I requested that Anakin accompany her back home, being that Clovis had left the day after the attack. I convinced Qui-Gon and the council of this idea.

Qui-Gon had already returned to Lestrad without Anakin. He felt Padmé needed a companion more so than he needed a padawan for the time being. So a week after the accident he took his wife and children home.

I felt bad for isolating Calypso from her friends and family but knew this was important for her to grow. She had been spoiled in her freedom of emotions and I needed to bring her back to reality.

No more attacks had happened, but Mandalore felt like it was holding its breath. Satine had been irritable as of late, I assumed the attack still affecting her. She has not requested my presence in a three months, although she did permit me to guard her whenever she traveled anywhere outside her room.

I knew being apart from Satine was important, I had been completely letting my emotions overcome me. Now I had all the time I could ever need to focus and train Calypso.

A month after the attack Satine unexpectedly called me to her room. I was wary of her reasoning for seeing me alone in her quarters and wanted to strive to keep the conversation completely professional.

"Duchess Satine," I said and bowed cordially, "you requested an audience with me?"

She seemed taken aback by the formality of my greeting but motioned for me to sit by her on her couch. My chest tightened remembering the last time she'd motioned me to the couch. When I'd kissed her and then the rest of our torrid affair had seamlessly unraveled.

I sit and Satine grabs my hands in both of hers. "Obi," she says and smiles at me and I'm instantly helpless. I couldnt put up walls with Satine if I tried; to her they're merely rooms of a home she is the heart of.

"Obi, I don't quite know how to say this," she starts and I remember this exact conversation last time, although I assume this conversation will take a far different turn, "I have been avoiding having this conversation with you for I was fearful of your reaction. Not that I expect it would be anything less than refined gracefullness, I did hope perhaps this time you would surprise me."

I'm beyond confused at what she is trying to get at and I feel like she's rambling, not a usual trait of the duchesses'.

"All this to say that should your reaction be that of horror and shame, a decision will have to be made by the both of us. One that will be practically sufficient for the remainder of your stay within my home and that which will continue after your departure." She continues but I just need her to say what she needs to.

"Satine, I'm afraid your preambles have left me lost. Please end my mind upon my purpose in your quarters." I say, attempting to be as polite as possible.

She seems nervous to speak and it makes me equally nervous. Satine has never been one to tiptoe around a point or be unable to speak her mind, especially around me. She straightens, having made her decision to just come out with it. I wait in anticipation, but nothing could have prepared me for her words.

"Obiwan, I'm pregnant."

*****

Calypso's POV:

After the accident Anakin and I tried to get things back to how they were. But Obiwan would always keep me busy morning to night, probably to ensure Anakin never spent the night with me.

Still we tried to talk and see one another but Padmé was consistently around and although I began to grow a friendship with her, I really just wanted to be with my best friend. Satine, unfortunately, began to refuse to see Obiwan, or anyone for that matter, so that meant he had loads of free time.

Anakin and I still communicated through the force but our conversations became tougher to maintain. Everything was easier when we could be together. Eventually we stopped talking, too exasperated to continue.

When I learned of Anakins assignment to accompany Padmé back to Naboo I could hardly breathe. From not being able to be around Anakin during his time in Mandalore, to hearing he was heading to Naboo with this lovely senator, it was too much for anyone to take.

I shut off my emotions completely and continued to train morning to night with Obiwan, determined to not let my feelings overtake me as they had been for too long. I had nothing else but the order.

The day Anakin left for Naboo I made sure I was outside the city helping receive a new shipment of supplies. I couldnt say goodbye to him because if I did, I'd never want to let him go. Every defense I'd built up would dissolve in the warmth of his embrace and I couldn't do that again.

I looked back in the direction of the docks, only when I saw a ship in the distance. I knew he was on it and I turned back to my work, I wouldn't be upset.

I miss you, Cal. Use the comlink, please, when you're ready to talk.

I heard his voice in my head. My heart couldn't help but beat irregularly at the familiar sound, one I hadn't heard in weeks.

I couldnt ignore him, not when he was leaving for what could be many years.

May the force be with you, Anakin.

I hated the formality of the statement. But it was the safest thing for me to say and I needed him to know that I cared for his safety. I hadn't forgotten him, couldnt ever, but I couldn't be in his life while we had feelings for each other. Wed been foolish for thinking our actions based on feelings wouldnt have consequences.

Our friendship was fractured, our feelings were hurt. Our duties came first, always, and that lead to a lack of freedom, instrumental in any relationship. We had been living in a dream and I had been forced to wake us up. Now our reality is a nightmare of our own making, both of us unaware on how to escape.

I blocked out the sound of the receding ship but I couldn't contain the tear that snuck its way down my cheek.

I love you my thoughts betrayed me.

I hoped Anakin was too far away to receive it, but a bigger part of me hoped he wasn't.