Crave Me, Taste Me [FighterTutor 18+]

-23- 💋 Decided On You

[A/N - Thank you for 23k reads 🖤]

"If you have to hurt me, hurt me once. If you have to end it, get it done. You have all these choices, I have none. You're all that I have to lose. Couldn't hurt you if I wanted to. I've decided on you."
~Ben Platt, 'Hurt Me Once'

~~~

*Fighter's POV*

Something's wrong.

Tutor's face is pale, and he's been avoiding my gaze all day. I know that he's been stressed out about the marriage, but now I'm worried that there's more to it. Up until now, he's been somewhat optimistic that we would figure this out together.

Now, I'm getting the sense that he's losing hope.

I need the chance to get him alone so I can comfort him. We swore that we'd come up with a plan together, and I'm not about to let him be alone when he's clearly in pain. He needs me, I can feel it.

"Hey, Sai!" I jog down the hall to catch up with Saifah. "Have you talked to Zon lately?"

He sighs sadly. "No. My dad sensed that spell I did for you and Tutor, and took my phone away as punishment."

"Did he explain why he didn't want you casting that spell?"

"Something about attracting unwanted attention," Saifah shrugs. "Like I said before, he was pretty vague about it. Anyway, why'd you ask about Zon?"

"Tutor's been acting really off today, and I was wondering if he happened to mention anything to Zon about it."

"Not that I'm aware of. But if I hear anything, I'll let you know."

I smile weakly. "Thanks Sai, I appreciate it."

Saifah can't contact Zon, and I have no way of contacting Hwa. That leaves asking Tutor himself, and hoping he opens up to me about whatever's bothering him. Tutor has always been open and honest about his feelings in the past, and I'm hoping this time won't be any different.

I head up the stairs to Tutor's room, not really minding who sees at this point. Rumors have already been flying about the palace, and it's pointless to deny them. Besides, the rumors are the least of my concerns.

Knocking on the door, I wait patiently for Tutor to open the door. When he does, my heart aches from how exhausted he looks. His skin is pale, and there are bags beneath his eyes from lack of sleep.

"Fighter," Tutor says in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

I scoff, stepping into the room and locking the door. "What am I doing here? Tor, something is obviously bothering you. Talk to me, please."

He crosses his arms and looks down at the ground. "I'm just stressed about the wedding."

"Are you sure?" I ask with a raised brow. "It feels like there's something else going on." I reach out for him and he flinches. "See? You're pushing me away. Is it me? Did I do something wrong?"

"No!" Tutor immediately insists, stepping closer to me. "I promise, you did nothing wrong. I just... have a lot on my mind."

Sighing through my nose, I place my hands on his shoulders. "Can I do anything to help?" I softly offer. Tutor looks up at me with tired, glossy eyes.

"Can you hold me for a while?"

I scoop Tutor up in my arms, and he snuggles into my neck. Carrying him over to the bed, I gently set him down and help him strip down to his underwear. I do the same before slipping under the covers with him, pulling him to my chest. Tutor rests his head on my chest as I wrap my arms around him protectively.

"You know I love you, right?" I murmur against his hair.

Tutor is quiet for a moment before answering, "I know."

"And you know I'm not going to give up on us, right? I decided long ago that you were the only one I would ever love. As long as you want me, I'm not going anywhere."

He doesn't respond as he embraces me tighter, tangling our legs beneath the sheets as if trying to merge our bodies into one. I pepper soft kisses to his forehead, whispering calming words to my lover. As I hold him, I feel him beginning to relax in my arms, his eyes growing heavy.

"Sleep, little prince," I whisper, kissing his temple. "I'll be here when you wake up. I promise."

Tutor hums, turning his head slightly to kiss my chest. After a few minutes, I hear his breathing grow heavier as he finally falls asleep. I watch him as he sleeps, soaking in every moment I can with him. Our future is uncertain and frightening, but I know I would do whatever it takes to make Tutor happy. If he wants me to stay with him forever, I wouldn't need to be asked twice.

If he wanted me to leave... well, I can hope that I would do what he asks without argument, but the truth is that I would be shattered. Tutor and I promised that we would stay together. But still, if he decides that staying with me is more trouble than it's worth, I would want to respect his wishes.

I just hope that he's not actually giving up on us. I know he's under a lot of stress, wanting to appease his father and become king one day, and I'm an obstacle to that. If Tutor wants to stay with me, he'll have a hard time. Of course, I would try to make up for it in any way that I could. I would provide him with more love than he ever dreamed possible.

Tutor is my everything. I have no other choice but to love him, regardless of what that entails.

~~~

Kind of a short, filler chapter so we can see what's going through Fighter's head during this

Have you ever tried writing angst while Mickey Mouse Clubhouse plays in the background? It's weird lmao #momlife

Thoughts??

See you next time!
-Gumbie