Everything Anew

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-One

Lila

We packed the trunk of both cars with food and water, and headed out. The trip would take us a few hours, and it was late enough already that most of the pack would sleep along the ride. Seojoon and I were in Nathan's car, while Eric, Markus and Evan were in the other.

Nathan's hands clenched and unclenched on the steering wheel while he drove. I wasn't sure if the action was due to irritation caused by the Rogue pack earlier, or from something else entirely.

"Get some rest, it'll be a long trip." He said in a voice that expressed his own exhaustion.

I sat in the back, Seojoon insisting that it would be best for me so I could lay down and fall asleep if need be, but my mind was distracted with so many thoughts that I struggled at the attempt. Instead I focused on their conversation. Seojoon was going on about his latest inspiration for his paintings while Nathan listened. To some, hearing someone ramble while driving might have been annoying, but it seemed to be a welcome distraction for Nathan.

When he replied, it would be in short quips, even hearing him chuckle under his breath when Seojoon made a bad pun. As the conversation began dying down, it was the alpha who brought up a new point of discussion. "How have you been doing anyway?"

There was a stretch of silence before Seojoon's voice broke it. "Managing. The stress of everything kinda sucks to say the least. Still a little shaken up since the break in, but I've been doing a lot of work, selling some paintings. I might try a new medium to spice it up a bit." He trailed off and shifted in his seat. "How have you been holding it together?"

Nathan took a deep breath in, his posture straightening up from the question. "You know me Joon. Just hanging in there, worried about all of you." He shook his head, his attention never leaving the road. "If anything happened to any of you, I'm not sure I could take it."

"Nothing will happen." Seojoon cut in, though even his voice sounded uneven. "You're doing good keeping us all together. I know going to the Frosted Fangs isn't easy for you, but it shows you really are trying, that's all we can ask for."

The sound of the car humming along the road relaxed me to the point where I felt myself finally drifting off, but Nathan's voice broke me from my reverie.

"How's Eric?"

Another pause, this time a little longer than the last. "Okay." Seojoon exhaled. "That's what he says right? That he's fine, that he's okay. We know how much of a lie that is." His tone expressed just how upset he had become talking about it. Seojoon's honey brown eyes casted to me in the rearview mirror, then returned to Nathan. "I'm a bit worried what might happen if things get worse."

Nathan brought a hand up from the steering wheel and ran it through his hair uneasily. "I'll talk to him when we get back."

This time, silence persisted throughout the drive, allowing Seojoon to press his forehead to the window and fall asleep. I kept my gaze on Nathan, who was so focused on the road that I didn't feel like I'd be caught staring. His facial hair had grown out a bit more than usual, the stress causing him to ignore his personal responsibilities while focusing instead on everything else. His jaw was defined by the way he clenched it, yet again showing something was bothering him. Even as I found myself wanting to drift off, I parted my lips and found myself speaking instead.

"Nathan, are you okay?" My voice was only a whisper, but the alpha's head subtly turned to look over his shoulder at me for a split second. His eyes found mine, only to return to the road quickly thereafter.