Everything Anew

Chapter Forty-Two

Forty-Two

Lila

I managed to stay alive another two days in the hellhole. I was given tablets to take every morning, and was watched closely each time I took them. I felt them go down my throat, disappear into my stomach, and yet they still hadn't done anything to me.

I had to pretend the entire time that they had. I would fake easiness around them, even though I was afraid they'd sense that I was actually feeling the complete opposite. Somehow no one touched me yet, but the only reason for that was because of Nathan. He stuck to my side every second of the day, only leaving when he knew no one would bother me. It was only a matter of time until someone would finally make their first move, and I tried to ready myself for it.

When Nathan left the tent, I did push ups and sit-ups for an hour every morning. I struggled with cardio in such small quarters, but decided it wasn't worth doing it out in front of the rebels. Their eyes would stay glued to me, and the longer they watched me, the more uncomfortable I became.

Nathan also managed to take less of the drugs regardless of his irritation towards the idea. He went from taking two every morning, to one, but he behavior was barely changing. I would notice the smallest of things, but when he turned back to the rebels with a smile on his face, and all hope was suddenly lost.

I'd keep trying regardless, and I had three days to make sure he wasn't dependent on it so he could fight alongside us when the time came. Until then, I did my best to stay away from the others, especially Skoll. Whenever I noticed the cursed shifter, my skin would crawl.

I've heard of it before, but had never seen it for myself. When a shifter loses their humanity and gives themselves fully to their wolf, the animalistic side of them takes control. The issue with that, is a wolf doesn't know how to cope with the intelligence and mind of a human, so when the wolf surfaces, the need to hunt and survive overpowers the logic and empathy that a person usually feels. Once a shifter loses their humanity, they become worse than an animal.

They become monsters.

Skoll stalked the perimeter of the Rebel's territory, noticing no one else stayed near him for most of the day. They were afraid of him too, and as his lumbering, furred body went from walking on two legs to moving on all fours, I couldn't blame them. He was their new guard dog, an alpha without a title. They wouldn't allow him to be called that, but the way everyone listened to the little words he spoke, it was obvious he was in control.

While Skoll was a leader, Caligo was the subordinate. Even when I first met him, I could tell he tried fitting in. He was a decent leader, but everything he tried to control crumbled away with his lack of dominance. Behind that layer of confidence hid a side of him that I rarely saw, but I'd notice when he cracked. He needed appraisal from others, so much so that I remembered the few times he genuinely asked me if I enjoyed what he did to me in the middle of the act.

I gritted my teeth and took a single step outside to rid my thoughts and see what was happening around me.

Another fight in the ring was beginning, and all I had to do was turn to my left to see it. A large crowd of people came together, cheering on whomever they bid on to win in the fight. I knew Nathan took part in them from time to time, but I detested the idea of using my wolf for their sport.

A tap on my shoulder spun me around, and I tried to stand my ground when I noticed whom it was. Nathan told me his name was Bishop, a man about my height that stole glances at my mate when he thought I wasn't looking. I wasn't used to having someone else's eyes on him rather than on me, but it didn't ease me any less.