First Love // H.S.

58

2 months later

Nobody except Harry knows I'm pregnant yet.

Harry still thinks it's Luke's baby, and hasn't reached out to me for two months. And because it's not Luke's baby, I haven't said anything to Luke.

I'm planning on moving to Amsterdam to start over with the baby. I'm actually keeping the baby. I believe I am strong enough to take care of this baby by myself.

Remember when I went to Amsterdam in 2013 because I got scouted at a Victoria's Secret company? And they said that they would still want me if I called in 2016? It's 2016 now, and I'm planning on calling them. Of course I have to stop modeling when my baby bump stars to show.

I'm not showing yet, but I know I have to tell my family I'm pregnant as soon as possible. I can't tell them who the real father is, though. They'll only convince me to go to Harry and tell him that he is.

I don't want Harry to get distracted from getting a successful solo career. It's better for him if he doesn't know about the baby. He literally said how relieved he was the baby isn't his— that he couldn't have a baby in his life right now.

Maybe if I tell him he's the father instead of Luke, he'll think that I'm telling him that as a desperate move to attach him to my life forever, because I still love him and he doesn't love me anymore.

I know that I have to tell him someday. Just not now. I'll tell him when I know for sure that he's ready to become a dad. And I have no idea when that will be. It could be in a month, or in two years, maybe even five. I have no idea.

*

'No, no, no, Freddie, don't cry!' I say with a baby voice while holding the one week old Freddie Tomlinson.

'You're not killing my son, right, Liv?' Louis asks jokingly.
'No, he's just a little scared of me.' I laugh.
'As he should be.' Niall comments. I look up at Niall with an offended look on my face.

'Oh, no!' I say when Freddie starts crying again. Louis sighs and takes Freddie out of my arms.

'Louis! Freddie wants to be with his auntie, not you.' I protest.
'Freddie wants to be with his dad, certainly not his auntie.' Louis answers as he sits down on his couch with Freddie.

'When are you having your first baby, Liv?' Niall asks. I can feel my heart skip a beat.

'U-Um, I dunno.' I stutter with an awkward laugh.
'Do you have a boyfriend right now?' Niall asks.
'No. I've been single for two months for the first time in five years.' I answer.

'Ah, yeah, you're barely ever single. You first had that perv in Malibu, then Harry, then Maximo-boy, then Harry again, then Lukey-trashboy, and then Harry, and then Luke again.' Louis speaks up. No one knows that Harry and I dated again for two weeks after Maddie's party.

'Lots of Harry. When are you getting back together with Harry, Liv?' Niall asks.
'Probably never.' I chuckle, but on the inside, my heart breaks.

'Liv!' Liam calls as he puts his arm around Niall.

'Wanna do a shot with us?' He asks.
'Oh, u-um— no, thanks. I'm good.' I stutter.
'Aw, really? Why not?' Niall whines.
'U-Um, I'm not allowed to drink alcohol. Work stuff.' I lie.

'Why aren't you allowed to— Hey, Harry!' Liam suddenly calls out, looking away from me and pulling his arm off Niall. I quickly sit down beside Louis and Freddie. Apparently, Harry just came in.

'Look, Freddie, that's Olivia. She's not scary. She won't bite you.' Louis says to Freddie, sounding incredibly cute and fatherly.

'Hi, Freddie! How are you?' I say to Freddie. Freddie looks at me, and starts laughing incredibly joyful, pointing his little index finger at me.