DISCONTINUED

Chapter 54

*** A/N:  See link to video in INTRODUCTION ***

*** A/N: Chapter / scene song from playlist - I'M SORRY (Richard Walters) ***

Luna walked slowly along the shoreline, collecting rocks. She knew that it didn't really matter what they looked like, but she mostly tried to pick pretty ones anyway, because... why not?

She closed her eyes, the ocean breeze cool and fresh on her face. She remembered reading something once - maybe it was from a fortune cookie or a horoscope, she wasn't sure - that said something like "don't cry over what no longer is but smile over what was". She did have a lot of great memories and she was trying her best to focus on those. Was she thankful for her life? Well, that was asking a lot. Her life was supposed to have really only just begun. She'd been cheated. Hard done by to say the least. And this present 'life' she'd been thrust into was barely worth living. It wasn't really living at all. But yes, she'd definitely had some good times. Great times. And for those she was truly thankful. That's what she'd try to think about. It was the best way - the only way - to honor those memories and the people she'd made them with. She stood and looked out at the horizon, but she couldn't even find consolation in the ocean anymore. It flaunted a freedom she knew she would never again experience.

She carried her arm load of rocks back to the backpack she'd left lying in the sand and dropped them where she'd already stacked a small pile of other stones. She sat down and unzipped the pack, pulling out a crumpled piece of paper and tossing it aside before placing all her rocks inside. When she was done, she zipped it closed and stood, lifting the pack with one arm. It was surprisingly heavy. Certainly heavy enough. She looked up and down the shoreline. There were a few people off in the distance, but she was all alone on this particular stretch of beach.

The piece of paper she'd discarded caught her eye. She smiled as she shook her head, recalling how her Mom was always telling her "leave the world a better place then you found it Luna". Clearly pollution was the least of her world's problems right now, and she knew that wasn't really what her Mom had been referring to anyway, but she still found herself bending over to pick up the paper. "This one's for you Mom" she said with a sad smile as she smoothed it out so she could fold it and stuff it in her pocket. As she did, the words jumped off the page and struck her with no less force than the first time she'd read them.

Per newly enacted statute #268 of the Security Act of the Independent Republic of Oregon, crimes against the state including escape, attempted escape, suicide or evasion can now result in discontinuance penalties being assessed against immediate family members of the accused.

In accordance with this statute, Garreth Oliver Timmons is required to present himself to authorities prior to June 21, 2033, 7 days from now, to face charges of evasion. Should he not so present himself, Luna Merribell Timmons, his daughter, will hereby be penalized for said failure to present, having her revised DoD date set to June 22, 2033.

Luna swallowed hard, her mouth dry despite the moist air blowing in off the ocean. She held onto the letter gingerly, as if it were some sort of weapon, like a knife or a gun. It might as well have been.

She had surprised herself with how quickly and how 'easily' she'd made her choice. No, it hadn't truly been easy - nothing about this was easy - but to her, the choice was clear, and she'd made it immediately, almost without thinking.

If her Dad turned himself in, which she knew he would do as soon as word of this notice got to him, they'd kill him. And the way things were going she figured that then they'd probably just kill her too. And even if somehow they didn't kill her, again... this wasn't living. What kind of a life did she really have? No, her Dad was the one that had a chance to live free. To really live at all. She wasn't going to rob him of that.

She knew that he still might do something stupid after the fact and get himself killed anyway, but at least this way there was a chance. There was a chance that he would respect her choice and, despite his grief and anger, he might... might just realize that the best way to honor her choice was for him to live. And with the weight of her imprisonment to the state finally lifted he'd truly have that chance. The chance to live. She wished that for him more than anything. This was her sacrifice and she was happy to make it. His sacrifice would be to abandon all thoughts of revenge and retribution and to try to create a new life for himself. She hoped that he was strong enough. If their roles were reversed, honestly, she wasn't so sure if she could do it. The pain of loss and the "survivor's guilt" would be so great. Yes, strange as it sounded, she realized that her sacrifice somehow seemed the easier one to make.

She shoved the letter into her pocket, and with some difficulty managed to hoist the pack over her shoulders. Funny. It made her think of all those hiking trips with her Dad over the years. When she was young the contents of her pack had been limited to a couple of stuffed animals and a small blanket - her Dad had carried everything. Then over the years she'd gradually started carrying more and more until finally, lately, her Dad had begun hiding heavy things in her pack that he didn't want to carry. The memory of her only discovering those items when they were setting up camp made her smile.

She snugged up the shoulder straps, took a deep breath and started walking towards the setting sun that was now beginning its ritual plunge into the ocean. She stopped, suddenly realizing that she was still wearing her boots. The funky ones she'd bought with Bo that day. Another good memory. Just as quickly she realized that it didn't matter, not this time, so she continued on, her boots now making sharp, clean impressions in the wet sand near the water's edge.

The ocean was relatively calm tonight. Just low rolling waves lapped up on shore. Good thing she thought, as any real waves would have likely made things a lot more difficult.

Her boots instantly filled with water as soon as the tops of them were submerged and they became heavy, forcing her to shuffle along slowly. As she waded in deeper, she had to fight the resistance of the water pushing against her legs, seemingly pleading with her to go back. Back to the safety of the beach. But she knew better. The beach wasn't safe. Not anymore. Nowhere was. Not for her. Her Dad could still be safe though. Truly safe. But only if she did her part.

She carried on, the water causing her to catch her breath as it rose above her waist. Soon it was up to her chest, then her neck. She felt herself sinking below the surface almost in time with the fast setting sun which was now doing the same. It was a beautiful sunset. There, that's a nice final image she thought.

Despite her intentions she couldn't stop herself from taking a final deep breath as the water crept over her mouth, her nose, her eyes and finally swallowed her completely. Still she kept shuffling forward, eyes now closed, thinking that the salt water would sting if she opened them. She realized that it was strange of her to be concerned about her eyes stinging, considering, but she still chose to keep them closed. Everything would go black soon anyway. All she had to do was breathe in. Just one big breath and she'd be free. And so would her Dad.

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"Luna? Lu... is that you?" Bo kept walking towards the form that sat motionless on the beach up ahead. "Lu, what the hell? I've been looking for you for hours. What are you doing sitting out here in the dark?"

When she didn't respond, he stepped closer and put a hand gently on her shoulder. She was soaking wet and shivering uncontrollably.

"Lu... are you ok? What happened? Why are you all wet?"

He knelt down beside her, but she just continued to stare silently down at the ground, not even acknowledging his presence. He shuffled around so that he was in front of her. Her swollen, red eyes lifted to meet his ever so briefly.

"I couldn't do it Bo" she murmured, her voice hoarse from her ordeal. Tears tried to once more form in her eyes, her eyes that had already given so much. She hung her head. "I couldn't save my Dad" she said as she allowed herself to fall into Bo's arms.