DISCONTINUED

Chapter 55

"So... how do you like it?"

"Well, it's different that's for sure. It's very, uh... black. If you're truly asking for my opinion," he looked at her questioningly and raised an eyebrow, "I'm not so sure. But hey, if you like it, I like it."

"It is awfully dark. I think the color was called midnight black or something, so 'as advertised' I guess." She reached up to hold a small handful of hair in front of her. "And yea, I'm not sure I'm crazy about it either. I think I'll try red next."

"Oh boy..."

"Hey, at least I'm out of bed, right? I had a couple of pretty dark days there for sure - being told you're going to die will do that to a girl - but then I thought to myself, you know, I'm not dead just yet. So, I figured 'I'm gonna live while I'm alive' sort of thing. And since I always wanted to color my hair I figured, no time like the present. Since, you know, that's basically what I have... no time but the present."

Bo stared at her sadly and immediately got an elbow to his ribs for it.

"Uh uh. No way. You're not going to be moping around me mister. If you can't at least pretend to lighten up, then you can get off the bus right here and I'll go to the beach by myself."

Bo pursed his lips and silently hung his slowly shaking head.

"Look, Bo. The suck factor here is sky high. I know. Trust me. I know what's coming, or should I say I know what's ending. Me. I'm ending. And freaking soon too. And while I have absolutely no doubt that I'll be a complete mess on, you know... 'the day', right now I've, you know, accepted it." She shrugged her shoulders and threw up her hands. "Of course I'm not happy about it, but there's nothing I can do. What's done is done. Or better yet, who's done is done. I'm done Bo. So PLEASE do me really the only possible meaningful favor you can at this point and allow me to enjoy the time that I have left as much as possible. You can sulk all you want when I'm gone."

After a couple of minutes of riding along silently, Bo turned to her.

"You know where we should be going? We should be going to see your Dad Lu! I mean... seriously."

"Yea. I know. He's been pretty desperate to see me since he got the news."

"Ya think?"

"The only reason he hasn't turned up on my doorstep already - or at least tried to - is because I promised I'd go see him. Soon."

"You say it like it's a chore." Bo shook his head. "I don't get it Lu. Don't you want to see him?"

"Yes, of course I want to see my Dad you idiot." She paused, taking a deep breath. "Sorry. That was uncalled for. Of course I want to see my Dad. I want to be with my Dad. And with my Mom. As, you know, a family. But that ship has clearly sailed."

"Hey, in case you forgot, I missed that boat too Lu" said Bo quietly.

Luna threw her head against the seat back and closed her eyes. "Again... apologies. As I march toward my pending, now just around the corner doom, I'm apparently becoming rather self-absorbed. I'll try to be better. Anyways, as much as I want to see my Dad - and I really do - I'm just not convinced that it's going to help either one of us. Of course I'm absolutely dreading the final 'good-bye'. Can you imagine??? But I'm also really afraid that seeing me will just encourage him to do something stupid and get himself killed too. Somehow I've got to convince him to just accept it and walk away. It's his only choice."

She chewed on her lip as she stared out the window. "I could have solved this whole mess a couple of nights ago Bo. My Dad could have been living free - truly free - right now if I just hadn't been such a little chicken shit. Maybe I should try again..."

"I wouldn't exactly call killing yourself a solution Lu."

"Well, I'm all ears if you've got a better idea. Clearly my fate is sealed. I think we've established that. Or perhaps more precisely they have. Five days from now it's 'so long Luna'. Now the only meaningful thing left for me to do is to try to stop my Dad from going down with me. But, you know, 'Captain of the ship' and all, I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to talk him out of it. If I was gone already then at least there's a chance. But I'm not gone because I'm weak, and now my Dad won't be able to resist trying to save me. Which is impossible and will only get him killed too. They're killing me Bo, but I'm killing him."

Luna wiped tears from her eyes. "So please, if you've got a solution to my problem Bo, let's hear it."

Bo stared at her for a moment, hesitating briefly, then leaned in closer as he spoke. "I've been thinking about it Lu, a lot." He instinctively looked around the bus before turning back to her. "You could try to escape."

"Escape?"

"Shhhhhhh. Keep your voice down!"

"That's your plan? Escape?? Nobody escapes Bo. You know that. It would be suicide to try."

"Right. Says the girl who walked into the ocean wearing a backpack full of rocks."

"Ok. Yes... I see your point." She sat silently for a moment, flicking her chin with her finger, then sighed heavily. "Sadly, I think this falls squarely in the same bucket as all of the other 'solutions' that I'm just not brave enough to try."

Bo hesitated again. "What if I went with you? What if we went together?"

"What? Uh uh. No way. No! I'm the one here whose death is imminent, not you. You've got like, what... 30 years left or something if you're lucky? No way. You can forget that idea right now."

She paused briefly before giving him a backhanded swat across the chest.

"Shit Bo. It's bad enough that I have to worry about keeping my Dad alive, but now I've got you - healthy, years to live you - proposing to jump off the proverbial cliff with me. C'mon Bo... you know better. This isn't helping. At all."

"Ok, ok. Calm down. I hear what you're saying. But... what if we could actually escape, for real? Yea, it's super risky and maybe we'd die trying - ok, probably we would I guess, to be honest - but you've already made it abundantly clear that you think that's your best shot at saving your Dad, and goodness knows you're bouncing around all kinds of other ways to kill yourself. And as for me, what if the tiny chance that we could actually, maybe make it is worth it to me? How many times have you yourself said that this... this isn't really living anyway?"

"Bo, it can't be done. There is no tiny chance. There's zero chance. You try you die. Forget it. It's not an option."

"I went to see the people at the laundromat yesterday Lu."

"You did what? Why?"

"They've heard rumors Lu that there's a cure. Outside. That there's a procedure that can be done to save us."

Luna stared at Bo blankly.

"They couldn't say for sure, and honestly they were super skeptical, but yea... they said that it's possible. But even if such a thing were true, the trick would be to get help in time. Because soon as you got beyond the control boundary you'd be on the clock and your body would start shutting down..."

Bo was more or less talking to himself now, and Luna could tell that it was an internal conversation that he'd had many times already.

"And of course, that's assuming that you could even get through or under or over - whatever - the fence..."

"It's suicide Bo and you know it. And as much as I appreciate you offering to go all 'Thelma and Louise' with me, I won't let you do it. So thanks, but just drop it alright."

She could see him trying desperately but failing to understand the reference.

"It was a movie that I used to watch..." she sighed "...that I used to watch with my Mom. These two best friends Thelma and Louise end up driving their car off a cliff, holding hands and all. It's very dramatic."

She gave him a sad grin. "Look... thanks. Really. It's very sweet of you, but it's no use Bo. It's just no use. I'll talk to my Dad. I'll make him understand. He has to understand."