Saving Her

Chapter 64

Shawn's POV

"You know mama, she's been the one girl I've always wondered what it would be like to be loved by.  She's always had someone else by her side until now that I sat on the sidelines for so long thinking I'd never get this chance." I say talking to Sinu at the kitchen table over morning cups of coffee. 

Her and Sofi have been home a few days at this point.  Sofi had a particularly bad night last night so she found herself snuggled between Camila and I.  When I woke up this morning I was holding hands with Camila over Sofi's back.  Camila must not have even noticed because when I woke up, she was still sound asleep and so was Sofi; hence how I'm now having coffee with mama.

"She always had a soft spot for you mijo.  I don't know why she tried to hide her feelings for you for so long.  She'd deny every time I'd ask her about her feelings towards you and I feel like as much as I hate to say it; she used Andy as an excuse to distract her from the fact that she was in love with you." Sinu admits with a somber look on her face.  The sound of his name hurting both our ears.

"I don't think it helped that when I was going through the academy, I felt like I needed to act like more of a man and I was conditioned to be emotionless because if you show any emotion, that's when you're vulnerable and the people I work with can sniff that out in a second and use it to their advantage." I said.

"I can see that. You've come from such a good family though that I think you've always been grounded and you know how to find yourself again." She says.

"I guess I never thought about it like that. I've always just wanted to "be a man" so the speak. It just didn't seem at the time that I could be both."

"It's okay to be both Shawn. Ale would be the first one to tell you; there were days when he tried to be stoic and untouchable and there were days that he cried himself to sleep or wrote in his journal because something was hurting his heart."

Getting up from the table, she grabs my cup and fills it with more coffee as she lets me ponder this revelation about Ale. Ale Cabello, much like my own father had always encouraged me to be who I wanted to be, not what I had to be. Hearing that he had emotions and wrote in journals just solidified that now that I'm doing the same thing, I'm not any less of a man because of it.

The timer on the oven dings and the thought of Sinu's warm chocolate chip muffins makes my mouth water. She takes them out of the oven to cool before returning to sit with me at the table and handing me a fresh cup of coffee.

"Thank you for telling me that about Ale mama. I know my dad has done similar things but sometimes it helps to hear that someone else you always looked up to did it as well."

"You're welcome son. Ale would be so proud and so thankful for the man you are becoming and I know that Manny is proud of you as well. You're an amazing man and I don't know how I can ever thank you enough for saving my daughters." She says, tears starting to form in her eyes.

"Oh mama, don't cry!" I say sadly as I get up from my chair to sit next to her and pull her into a hug.

"We could have lost her." She sobs quietly. "You saved her life Shawn. I'm a mom, I'm allowed to get emotional too!" She chuckles as her tears wet my shirt. I pull her in tighter and laugh with her as she pulls away and dries her tears.

"What did you do now Shawn?" Sofi's voice carries from the stairs. Her hair is flying in every direction and she looks exhausted but she looks better than she did last night. I make a mental note to talk to her later to make sure she's okay.

"Oh nothing sis. Just having a heart to heart with mama." I reply.

"Did you tell her you and Camila had sex?" She questions me, shooting me a devilish look as head a plate drop behind us.