Saving Her

Chapter 49

Shawn's POV

The next morning Camila is still snuggled into my side. Her soft lips still pressed to my neck as if she's breathing in my scent, feeling my pulse to make sure I'm not just a figment of her imagination. I didn't mean to snap at her last night and I had not intended on waking her up in a panic. I didn't know she didn't sleep in the bed with me until after she woke me up; so where did she sleep? How do I tell her the reason I got sent home early was because the case I was working reminded me of hers... except this time I didn't rescue a live girl.... I recovered a dead one and her long wavy brown hair and small frame in my hands reminded me of her. Of the night I carried her in my arms, praying to God that she was alright; that I wasn't too late. How do I tell my girl that last night was the second worse night of my life because everything about the scene was wickedly familiar.

What kind of cruel joke is that?

I feel her stir next to me as she slowly removes herself from my side. Sitting up, I watch her stretch, wiping the sleep from her eyes. I can tell she's been crying, her body is stiffer than normal as well. She looks uncomfortable. Last night took a lot out of both of us and I can't help but feel guilty.

"Morning." She sighs quietly as she looks over at me.

"Morning beautiful." I reply just as quiet.

"How are you feeling this morning?" She asks, her eyebrow raised, concern etched on her face.

"I'm better. I'm sorry if I scared you last night."

"You more than scared me Shawn." She says firmly, looking me square in the eyes. "I slept in the bathtub last night because you came home, snapped at me and made it pretty clear you didn't want to be near me, so I had to figure something else out." She explains, her voice tight as she tries to stay calm.

"You slept in the bathtub? Why didn't you sleep on the couch or in my old room if you didn't want to come to bed?" I question, looking at her with concern, trying to figure out how her sleeping in the bathtub was my fault.

"Because Shawn, I still wanted to be near you and the only way I could do that was by sleeping in the tub." She replies plainly; like that's the answer I should've expected.

For some reason a part of me is slightly pissed that she would make herself that uncomfortable just for me. Why would she do that? I'm a big boy, I don't need her to always take care of me, it's my job to take care of her. The other part of me is annoyed at myself for what happened last night.

"Well you didn't have to do that!" I snap. I didn't mean to, but when she looks at me wide eyed, I realize it's too late.

"You know what, clearly we aren't going to get anywhere this morning so I'm going to go get ready in mama's room so we don't end up saying things we both regret." She snaps back. "I'm sorry for caring and being worried about you." She says as she storms off the bed, her voice sounding weaker so I know she's on the verge of tears.

Good job Shawn, you idiot.

"Mila...baby...wait please." I say as a scramble off the bed and follow her into her closet as she's grabbing at her clothes and underwear to bring to Sinu's room.

"Are you going to talk to me about last night?" She asks incredulously.

"I....." I stammer. "I can't baby." I say looking down in defeat.

"Mmmm okay, you know what? When you figure out what you want, you call me. Until then, don't come near me. Maybe you need to call Brian and go to therapy, obviously you don't want to talk to me..." she huffs, tears now rolling down her cheeks freely.