Mutuals

[62]

"Oh my days will you just stay" I mutter to myself trying to pin down my hijab
My outfit for this date was, let's just say, brave. Unconsciously I'd ended up dressing in something I'd never usually wear. But I guess I wanted Harris' attention and this was probably the way to get it

I was dressed in a black bodycon chiffon dress that had big flowy sleeves, detailed with white pearls. I'd paired it with black tights and my hijab was just plain black. For makeup I had gone for an autumnal smokey eye and for shoes I had my black embellished heels.

I grab my heels and purse and go and sit on my sofa to wait for Harris. He told me to be ready by 8 and it was currently 7.57pm and I was absolutely crapping myself. All I'm thinking is, if I shit myself he'll see it because I've not even got pants on I'm wearing tights.

I grab my phone and scroll through Instagram mindlessly liking a couple posts here and there. Until I realise that twenty minutes later still no sign of Harris and he hasn't even texted me.
I feel the need to text him and ask him where he is but my common sense decided to pipe up and convince me to leave it.

Another fifteen minutes have passed and I feel my heart sink more and more as the seconds pass by.

He really stood me up

I look down at my phone with a lump in my throat
Why do I always get made to look stupid?

My phone flashes with a message and I feel my heart float up hoping it's a text from Harris but instead it's Adil replying to a selfie I'd put up on my story whilst waiting for Harris

Adil💯 - who you all dressed up for👀 x
Zara🌻 - I had plans
Adil💯 - had?
Zara🌻 - yeahhh didn't work out
Adil💯 - what happened
Zara🌻 - never mind doesn't matter
Adil💯 - tell me x
Zara🌻 - are you working
Adil💯 - yea bby but I got time for you x
Zara🌻 - can I come sit whilst you work
Adil💯 - ooooh yeah more than welcome x
Zara🌻 - what time do you finish
Adil💯 - finish at 10 then we can go for a drive x
Zara🌻 - food?
Adil💯 - course princess come x
Zara🌻 - I'll be twenty minutes
Adil💯 - okay x

Honestly I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. I change out of my dress and throw on an oversized jumper dress with a belt and a put my vans on. I mean, I have a full face of makeup on but I don't really care.

I drive over to the dessert place he works at nervously walking in through the door. I have to act like a paying customer so I walk over to the counter and he doesn't seem to be there
"How can I help?" A short woman asks
"Erm is Adil working here by any chance?" I ask fiddling with my car keys
"Yeah I'll just call him for you" she says before going into the back

I move to the side slightly and lean against the empty table to my right.
"Evening darling" his voice makes me melt a little bit and I turn to him with a smile
"Hi" I reply in a little voice, completely not anticipating it to come out like that
"What's up" he asks with his eyebrows furrowed
"It's nothing" I reply as he grabs hold of one of my hands
"You came all this way and you're not gonna tell me what made you upset?" He tuts
"Who said I'm upset" I say avoiding his eyes
He kisses his teeth,
"Your voice is full of it baby, look at me" I can hear the smile in his voice and I laugh before looking up at him

"Mmm smile more, flipping frowning all the time"
"Whatever shut up"

"I got an hour of work left and then we'll go yeah?" He says and I nod my head
"I'll wait here" I say pointing at the booth behind me
"Do you want anything?" He asks and I shake my head
"Nothing?" He asks and I shake my head slowly

He shakes his head but walks away to get back to work meanwhile I sit at wait for him
Once it hits 9.26pm I get a text from Harris

Harris - fuck are you still ready

I feel a sarcastic smile creep up on my face and my eyes fill with tears and I take a big deep breath

Me - no
Harris - can I come over
Me - no
Harris - can you say something other than no I'm sorry
Me - no

I put my phone down and put my head in my hands stressfully squeezing my eyes shut. I feel like screaming.
My phone starts buzzing and I know it's Harris so I ignore it but he is persistent as hell

"Hi, Zara is really busy at the moment and she won't call back" I answer
"Wait Zara please" his voice instantly stops me from hanging up
"The fuck do you want?" I ask rudely but he deserves it if you ask me
"I'm trying over here and you're making it impossible" he argues
"Excuse me" my eyes widen, "me? I'm making it impossible? What about you, who you didn't show up and is texting me nearly two hours later begging to come over"
"I had shit to do but I texted you as soon as I was free" he reasons
"Okay so I'm clearly not a priority"
"It was important Zara"
"Whatever"
"Can I come over, we should talk still" he asks
"I'm not at home" I reply bluntly
"Why where are you?"
"I said I'm not home, bye" I hang the phone up and literally throw it on the table

"Ready to go?" Adil comes into view and I nod my head
I am such a whore

We drive to McDonald's to get some food and once we've ate he decides to put his nose into my business again
"So tell me what happened tonight"
"What happened?" I ask acting oblivious
"What happened with your plans that didn't work out" he elaborates
"It doesn't matter, it's whatever" I shrug
"It's not whatever, you were upset"
"You're not gonna like it" I warn but he shrugs his shoulders

"I was supposed to have a chat with Harris today but he didn't come"
"Is that a joke" he asks and I shake my head
"I know it's bad, but I was being stupid" I close my eyes and put my head against the back of the seat
"You're chatting to me and getting close to me but you're still meeting up with your ex?" He asks
"But it didn't happen" I reason
"Well it was going to"

I sigh, "I don't know what to tell you, it was stupid I know but I was about to marry him at one point"
I sniffle, "if you're pissed that's fine but I'd rather you leave than give me shit because that's the last thing I need right now"

"I'm not gonna give you shit you doughnut, I know what it's like to be fixed on an ex, it's cool" he speaks up after a couple minutes of silence
"As long as you're done with him" he adds and I nod my head

Because I was... done with him but not over him

"Come here" he gestured for me to sit in his lap so I climbed over the handbrake very carefully and cuddled up to him
He took in my scent and I relaxed into him with my arms around his neck

After a couple minutes I feel his hands creep around towards my bum and I shuffle in a way to get him to stop but he doesn't
I take my head off his chest to look at him
"What?" He asks
"Stop feeling me up" I reply and he smirks
"I'm not" he says whilst I literally peel his hand off the bottom of my back
"Kiss me" he says
"No" I reply feeling myself get a bit angry
"Just do it innit, do you not like me like that?"
"That's got nothing to do with it" I argue
"Alright come on then" he puts his hand on my cheek and I move away
"Zara come on what the hell" I sense him getting agitated so I push myself off him and sit in the drivers seat and that's when I notice a fat boner sticking out his pants

"Oh my god" I mutter to myself

"Get out" I say
"What the fuck for?" He asks
I look at him with tears in my eyes, "please just get out"
"Zara chill... we'll talk"
"Out" I scream with gritted teeth

He swears under his breath but gets out the car and I drive away as soon as he does
I park up outside my apartment and shut the door behind me and breakdown as soon as I do

Not just my heart felt broken, my soul was officially tired

——————-

Here's a loooooooong chapter because I've been gone for like a month oops x
I'm really bad at updating but I'll try now I SWEAR I PROMISEEEEE

Hope you still liked it thoughhhhhhh xx