An Apple A Day(Trixya)

Trust

Katya laid in bed, tired and sore. Trixie had worn her out, she didn't mind it of course. She loved it. Although, in the back of her mind she still had doubt. Not about Trixie but about herself. How could she trust herself with getting close to Trixie again? Even if Trixie wasn't worried, Katya was. "Katya, we are about to go on a boat ride. Are you coming?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Are you feeling okay Katya?"

"Yeah, just a little tired."

"Do you want me to stay with you?"

"No, go. I'll be okay."

"I will come back and check on you, okay?"

"Thanks Jan."

"No problem, see ya later." Jan walked out of the cabin to the boats.

"Good morning Jan."

"Oh good morning Ms. Mattel."

"How are you?"

"I'm good, I'm really excited."

"That is good. Is Katya awake?"

"Yes ma'am but she isn't coming. She said she is tired. I was thinking about staying with her, I don't want to leave her alone."

"I can stay with her."

"I can't ask you to do that."

"It is my job really. I am over your cabin so I have to make sure you guys are alright."

"Thank you."

"Of course, now you go have fun." Jan ran off, jumping on Crystal's back. Trixie chuckled and walked off towards the cabins. She knocked on the cabin door softly. "Katya? Baby?"

"Come in."

"Are you feeling okay?"

"Yes, just tired."

"That's my fault huh? I'm sorry." Trixie sat on the bed beside Katya, rubbing her shoulder.

"It's okay, don't say sorry. But why are you still here, I thought you and the others were going for a sail?"

"Jan was worried about you so I told her I'd stay with you."

"You didn't have to Trixie."

"It's okay, trust me. Now you get some sleep."

"Trixie.."

"Yeah?"

"Will you lay with me?"

"Is that what you want?"

"Yes."

"Okay." Trixie laid next to Katya, looking at her. "Katya, may I ask you something."

"Mmhm."

"Why did you ask me if I loved you?" Katya yawned as she laid her head on Trixie's chest.

"Because I wanted to know." Trixie groaned. That wasn't really an answer, or at least an answer that satisfied Trixie. Katya softly said something..something that Trixie couldn't hear. Katya was going in and out of sleep. She was tired, barely awake.

"What'd you say sweetie?"

"I said and because I love you." And with that Katya was fast asleep. Trixie stared at the ceiling, processing what Katya had just said. She didn't say loved, she said love.

"You..love me?"

***

Trixie slowly opened her eyes, moving her hair out of her face. She looked around but didn't see Katya anywhere. After slipping her shoes on, Trixie made her way out of the cabin. She saw Katya standing at the docks, looking out at the lake. "Hey."

"Hi. Waiting for something?"

"How long before the others get back?" Trixie looked at her watch as Katya threw a pebble into the lake.

"About two more hours."

"Hmm, okay."

"Are you feeling okay Katya?"

"Yes, how'd you sleep?"

"Um good, I guess I was tired also even if I didn't feel it. Did you sleep well?"

"Yes, I always do when I'm with you."

"Well, that's good. Is something wrong Katya?"

"No, why do you ask?"

"You just seem so distant from the world right now. Like you're standing here, but not here at the same time."

"That easy to notice?"

"For me it is, yes." Katya sighed before turning to face Trixie.

"How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Move on. Trust me. How? How can you?" Trixie rubbed her neck and looked up at the clouds.

"Because I've been hurt before."

"That makes no sense."

"To me it does. Katya, you didn't mean to hurt me. It wasn't out of malice or because you were bored. Nothing like that. You just didn't think or you did what you thought was best at the time. Not to mention, you were going through something, you were hurting. And as they say hurt people hurt people."

"I guess I just don't understand. Your ex hurt you and I told myself I wouldn't do that because after you cried in my arms I just," Katya gribbed her arm, holding back tears. "I don't want to be the reason you cry.."

"Katya, you aren't my ex okay? You are nothing like her. It took me some time to accept that, but I know that you aren't. I always have. You don't have to fight to stop yourself from being someone you aren't capable of being. It's not possible for you to be that way, to be like her."

"And how do you know that?"

"Because we wouldn't be talking right now if you were. You wouldn't be standing here on the brink of tears because you're scared of hurting me again."

"Stop that."

"Stop what?"

"Reading me like some open book, it's not fair."

"I think it is very fair." Trixie took a few steps closer to Katya, grabbing her hand softly. "I know it will take a bit of time for you to bounce back, I'm not telling you to rush into anything. I'm not telling you to get over what you're feeling, because I know how hard emotions can be. But what I am telling you is that it is okay. I have forgiven you and I trust you, so maybe just maybe try to forgive and trust yourself." Katya looked at Trixie with teary eyes. She hid her face in Trixie's chest, wanting to feel the warmth of the woman she loved. The woman that made Katya feel as if everything in the world was okay or at least going to be okay.