Who Is Lucas Ryker O'Riley?

66. I REACHED OUT

Since Jeremy only had a learners permit, I couldn't ask him to drive us. He couldn't legally drive without an adult in the car, so I had already talked to Beck about giving us a ride to the amusement center and picking us up later.

She was more than happy to hear I was going on a date and had quickly agreed to drive us. She told me she had a few things she needed to do on that side of town anyways.

When I asked her about it, I had let her know that I wasn't telling my parents about the date, instead telling then I was going to the amusement center with her, explaining that they just didn't think I was old enough to be dating.

So much for my parents not knowing. Now that mom knew, it probably wouldn't be long before dad did too.

We headed over to Beck's house and rang the doorbell.

When Beck came out, she was grinning from ear to ear. She knew this was my first date ever and she was excited for me. 

She was really enjoying watching the girl next door, "shed her tomboyishness" for a more feminine style. She knew she was responsible for making possible my successful transformation from, in her mind - tomboy to girly-girl, and it made her extremely happy to witness.

If she only knew the truth of my change, I wonder what she'd think then. Maybe, one day in the future, the far distant future, I'll open up to her and tell her, but for now, I'm enjoying getting to go through this without anyone around, other than my family, knowing.

It was hard enough telling Mandy, I'm definitely not ready to tell anyone else.

Who knows, I may go through the rest of my life without ever telling anyone else. But alas, that's a decision to be made some other time. Right now I had more pressing things to concentrate on. Like how I was currently sitting in the back seat of Beck's SUV, headed on a date . . . with a boy.

On A Date With A Boy?!

The full weight of the reality of that statement hit me. Sure I had thought about it a lot since I agreed to it and I almost backed out earlier, but now it was actually happening and regardless of the reasons I was doing this, right now I was definitely freaking out.

What if he tries to hold my hand?

What if he puts his arm around my waist?

What if he enjoys the date so much he asks me out again?

What if he tries to kiss me, like Dave said?

What if, spending three hours with me, he figures out something isnt right?

I had to get my thoughts and nerves under control before I started hyperventilating, had a stroke, or worse, caused Jeremy to realize something was off with me.

I thought about the things Dave told me earlier up in my room and it helped me to relax a little.

Without turning my head, I looked over at Jeremy out the corner of my eye.

Did he have to sit so close to me?

I looked at Beck in the front seat to find she was looking back at me through the rear view mirror and saying something.

I had been so wrapped up in my own thoughts I didn't even realize she was talking to me.

I took a deep breath, calmed my mind, and focused on her.

She was gushing over "how perfectly adorable we looked together." (her words) She then made mention of how the two of us would make beautiful babies.

Ewww gross. Did she really just say that? Oh my gawd, no!

Who knows what she said before I was listening. That statement alone was enough to disturb me and make me very self conscious. It was also embarrassing.

From the look on Jeremy's face, I knew I wasn't alone in my assessment. He gave me a nervous smile them quickly looked away.

By the time we pulled into the amusement center I had managed to mostly calm myself down, however, as we exited the vehicle, some of the nervousness returned when Beck made another comment about how we made such a cute couple.

Jeremy told Beck we would be waiting for her in the same spot when she returned to pick us up in three hours.

"Do you have your own money, just in case," Beck quietly asked me so Jeremy wouldn't hear.

"I don't need any. It's a date. Jeremy's supposed to pay," I replied. "but yeah, I have a twenty."

She laughed. "You be a lot to learn. Yes, he should but a girl should also offer. Here, take this."

She handed me two twenty dollar bills.

"Just in case he takes you up on your offer to pay. Twenty alone won't be enough."

I paused for a moment before slipping the folded bills into my purse, thanked Beck, then turned around to join Jeremy waiting for me on the sidewalk.

I heard Beck chuckle.

"Have a wonderful time," she called out to us through her open window as she pulled away.

Jeremy then reached out to take my hand.

In that moment I didn't know what to do.

I could pull my hand away, but how would it look if I patently refused to accept his offer to hold my hand?

Convinced I had no other option, I reached out, accepting his offer.

He interlaced his fingers with mine. I cringed inside and my heart raced as we headed inside.