The Definition Of Forever (Inked Hearts 1)

Eighty-nine

AN:

Thank you guys for the 28k! 🥳
7 x 4 hehe

This chapter is dedicated to @Purplebees03 for you comment that made my day! 💜

Enjoy!!

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Diana first person POV:

Walking along a quiet street that is shaded by a row of trees, I sidestep a puddle left by an earlier rainfall and continue on my way. I have no direction in mind, no plan or map to follow, but I needed to walk, needed to simply... go.

After Kate and Jin Oppa came into Jungkook's room where we were talking, we had to wrap up quickly as Jin mentioned something about him needing to head over to the BigHit building to clear up some issue, and while I was disappointed we had to cut our talk short, another part of me was relieved that we had stopped before I could say something I'd regret.

The soft click of my slight heeled boots against the wet pavement registers in my head as more of a feeling than a sound, as I have my earbuds in and am listening to some "Piano Guys" to let the flow of piano and cello run through me and settle the feeling that still stirs.

This street is a good thirty-three blocks from some of the more main streets of Seoul, so there aren't as many people or cars that I need to watch out for as I walk absentmindedly. Normally, I wouldn't stray this far from the city, but as block after block passed by me, I found, I needed to keep going and let my feet travel wherever they need to go.

Letting out a sigh, I find myself continuing on another few blocks farther from the main streets and away from the city. I just need to... I need to... keep moving until... until I get to where I'm going.

While it was good to talk to Jungkook, and I felt that in the end, I'd said all that I needed to and all that was required to give an explanation for my behavior and reasons, it still wasn't everything... and now it's nagging at me.

I think he handled it rather well though... I mean- I think he understood, but- I still can't help but question why he was so interested in Thomas. The guy in question was also acting a bit odd when I spoke with him before he had to go back to LA.

The real conclusion is that: I, fundamentally and undoubtedly, don't understand guys. Never have, never will. There are friendships that I've had with guys where we know each other better than ourselves, but that doesn't mean that I necessarily understand "the ways of men".

On the other hand, not a lot of people on this earth seem to understand me either... for many reasons, a lot of which aren't hard to see why...

People thought I was crazy. How could a young girl like me, live in the city surrounded by friends and opportunities, not be in a relationship or so much as seek one out.

Sure, lots of my friends wanted to set me up, and there were many times when I would oblige them, but all of my close friends had at least figured out that I didn't long-term date anymore. So every blind date, every setup, and every time my phone number would be given away, it was always to someone who understood the lack of long-term commitment.

But I was content to live that way if it meant never hurting someone like that again. Even if it meant that I shut people out and refused when I wanted nothing more than to accept. They were rules that I made for good reason, and rules that I not only chose but also wanted to live by. The trouble is: I'm not sure I feel that way anymore.

I've gone another few miles now, and am starting to resent the hot sun that now shines down on my and my black coat. But if the weather were my biggest problem then I wouldn't be out here in the first place. So, I stick to the shade when available, and wish for the grey clouds.