El Turnia: Becoming Fire *DISCONTINUED*

Chapter 19: Chaos in Trottingham

It was the next morning after the killer pancake when I awoke to a loud bang from down the hall.
Ugh! What is it this time?
I stumbled out of bed and down the hall towards the noise. As I got closer I could hear the cries of guards, the roaring of... something and above all I could hear Christilia's voice screaming:
"PINEAPPLE MONSTERS!? SERIOUSLY?!"
Oh boy.
It was pure chaos. The guards were slowly being overtaken by a mass of giant pineapples that were falling from the ceiling by the dozen and Christilia was blasting as many as she could and occasionally missing and leaving behind giant holes in the walls and roof.
Great. Just great. This is definitely what I need right now! I haven't even risen the sun yet!
I quickly rose the sun so nopony would wonder why it was dark at 7:00 AM, then took a long breath and plunged into the writhing mass of mutant fruit.

"Ooooww.... ow! Why does this hurt so much!" I yelped as Christilia prodded me.
"Normally it wouldn't, but these were pineapple monsters.... now hold still you have another one riiiiigghtt here!"
"Aah!" I yelped again as Christilia stood up and held out another yellow spike.
"These were violent pineapples, yeesh!" I looked down at the large pile of yellow thorns that had collected on the ground and flinched.
"A pancake with fangs, pineapples that shoot thorns, what's next?" Christilia sighed. "We're busy as it is we really don't need an army of violent food taking over!"
I nodded. She was right, whoever's causing this wanted us to be distracted and weakened by these constant attacks. There were slowly wasting us away so we wouldn't be ready when they struck, in other words we had to do everything they didn't want us too. We needed to be prepared and alert so they wouldn't get what they wanted. Whoever they were.
"That's a good idea." Christilia said.
I looked at her, confused I asked:
"Huh? What do- oh. I just said that all out loud didn't I?"
"Yep." she replied

"I'm bored."
"I know."
"Why is this so hard?"
"I don't know."
Christilia and I sat in the throne room on the day after the pineapple monsters signing papers and writing responses to ponies who'd sent letters asking us for advice.
"Here's a letter from somepony named Green Apple, asking us how to ward off vampire bats." Christilia said.
"How should we know? Can't they ask us something more important like how to make a protection serum to keep trolls away?" I said enraged.
"If there were trolls around they would send out a distress beacon!" Christilia remarked.
"Yeah, yeah." I said with deep annoyance. "I'm just-"
"Shut up!" Christilia interrupting me.
"Jeez! What was that for?!" I asked angrily.
"Just be quiet for a minute will you?" Christilia shouted.
You're one to talk.
Then Christilia gasped and quickly handed me the letter she'd just been reading. I looked at the letter and saw three words:
Help. Please help.