YELLOW is the person who you are living for. the person who saved your life and the reason for your happiness.
"I dream slowly so that missing you doesn't come "(-perry poetry)
Being a mother of two lovely sunshines is something any woman would wi...
My heart has been clenching a lot lately. Raph's death anniversary is in a week, and I don't know how my mind and body are going to react this time, and the thought of that alone is making me have a panic attack. I just hope that it doesn't get worse like before, especially with my mom watching my every moment like a hawk, threatening to take my babies away. I know going to a therapist will help me, but I cannot reopen the wounds I messily put a Band-Aid on. Not now atleast.
A knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. I opened the door to see Owen standing there with a wide grin. I smiled back.
"Supp Olive!!!!" He said, raising his hands for a five. To which I laughed and returned. I had to stand on my tiptoe to reach his hand. No, I'm not short. He's just a giant.
"So what brings you here? " I asked him, and his face turned serious. "We still haven't talked about the possible arranged marriage," F*ck! I was trying to not think about it because both our parents have been quiet about it. I invited him, and we both sat on the couch. I looked towards the stairs. The kids won't come down. They are still awestruck by the scrapbook. They've been seeing the same pictures for a while now. "Owen, I don't know, I've been thinking about it, I know I said that I'm glad that I'll be stuck with you, but I don't want to put you or my children in that situation. I don't want you to not fall in love, and I also don't want to confuse my children once you do find one," I dragged.
"What if I told you that I feel something for you?" My eyes widened at that. No...
"Owen- I don't know what to say about that. Thats probably you being confused about everything, your mind is just finding a solution to make this agreement less painful, I don't want to do that to you."
"Olivia, you know, that's not the thing. I've been feeling that for you ever since I met you. The accidental kiss and that hug last week meant something to me. Didn't you feel anything?" he asked.
"I- I don't know, I told you, I don't know what took over me during all that. Owen, you don't deserve me. I have this huge baggage with me, that I refuse to throw away or open up about, and until its there, I don't know what is going on with me, or how I should feel about you."
" You still haven't moved on from your husband...... " his eyebrows furrowed, and I nodded slowly. "I'm sorry. I really am. Even I thought I liked you, but I realised it was just some sort of coping mechanism? Your personality reminds me so much of him, and I- I'm really sorry... For confusing you," I said, fiddling with my fingers.
Owen cupped my cheeks and made me look at him in the eyes, and he smiled.
" Hey, it's fine. Really. I get that. And it's fine. I will be there beside you while you try to move on. Like I said before, I would be right here, helping you with your demons," he said as he kissed my forehead.
" I don't know if I can move on, Owen. It just hurts, in here. " I said as I fisted my fingers and slowly beat on my chest, trying to get rid of the pain. Owen was quick to remove my hands and take me into a long embrace, which I accepted gratefully. I was now sobbing into his chest while he rubbed circles on my back.
After staying like that for 15 minutes or so. I pulled out.
"I'm sorry, I'm just-My head is messed up, and I cannot mess you up as well," I said, chuckling.
"Nahh, it's fine, but what do you plan on doing about your mother's threats?" Owen smiled.
"I honestly don't know, but I also refuse to pull you into this mess," I said motioning a hand towards me.
"You are not a mess, and even if you are, I am good at cleaning messes up," he said, and I just stared at him.
"I thought it was a good pun..." he trailed off. Both of us sat silently, thinking about every single doubt running through our heads.
"Hey, would you like to go out with me?" Owen asked out of the blue.
"Owen, I told you I'm not rea-" he cut me off. "Not a date. But with a friend kinda date?" he asked. " OK. Fine. But what about the kids? "I didn't want to leave them alone.
" Mom will take care of them, or we could take them with us," he said, and I nodded happily. I didn't want to leave the kids.
" So you don't mind if I bring the kids with me? " he shook his head. " Plus. I love their company. So it's cool."Owen said, chuckling. And I nodded.
" So what kinda clothing should I wear?" " Casual will do." I nodded my head.
____________________________ Hello... I just wanted to post a tiny Chap since I kept you guys waiting for 2 days. I. Hope you like this one.
Stay safe and happy everyone!!!!
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