Xavier and Nevah

63. Shes strong

Nevah POV

On the plane back to England, Xavier didn't talk to me. It's been two days and he's barely said a word to me. He hasn't touched me either, not a kiss, nothing. Every time I went to cuddle him, he moved away, eventually leaving the bed during the night.

After a long flight, we both got our bags and went through security and all that. We got out of the airport to see Sebastian stood by his car. I smiled at him while Xavier ignored him.

"Is he alright?" Sebastian asked me. I shook my head and got in the car. I thought Xavier would sit in the back with me, but he didn't. He sat in the passenger seat with Sebastian not even sparing me a look. The drive home was silent, not even the radio was playing.

When we parked up, Xavier got the bags out and went into the house with me following. Sebastian and I followed him as he walked inside.

"Hey bebito, how was it?" Paisley smiled at him.

"Fucking brilliant." Xavier mumbled and went upstairs. Everyone's eyes turned to me as I tried not to break down.

"What happened?" Logan furrowed him eyebrows in confusion. My heart rate went up as my hand subconsciously went to my hip.

"He didn't hurt you did he?" Danny stood up. He walked over to me and pulled me to his chest where I broke. I sobbed into his chest as he held me tightly letting my tears soak his T-shirt as well as me fisting it.

"Come on sweetheart. Let's go have a look." Danny sighed. We both went into the kitchen where I showed Danny the marks, still dark from three days ago.

My body shook as tears streamed down my cheeks. I took off my T-shirt and turned my back to Danny to show the marks on my back and shoulders, as well as the bruises on my hips showing a little.

"Memphis." He called out. Memphis came in and looked at my back, his eyes widening and all colour draining from his face.

"Can you get the cream from our room please?" Danny asked him. I heard Memphis going upstairs then come back minutes later.

"This will help it, ok? It'll ease the pain and help heal it a little faster." Danny told me. I nodded and let out a shaky breath as he rubbed it into my back and shoulder. "I'm guessing you had a great time."

"Y-yeah. U-until..." I trailed off. He nodded understanding what I meant. After the cream was applied, I put my T-shirt back on and turned to the man that adopted me. "He won't touch me again will he?"

"Not for a while." Danny shook his head.

Xavier POV

Her sobs sounded from downstairs. My hand went through the wall in our room wanting to just go back and be more gentle, to stop the bruising, to control myself from the hickeys and biting her.

Once again my knuckles bled from the harsh punch I gave the wall. A hole in its place, more anger going through me. A soft knock came at the bedroom door, I walked over and opened it.

"What?" I spat out, looking at Cole.

"Want to talk about it?" He asked me with a soft voice. I shook my head and sat down on mine and Nevah's bed.

"What happened?" Cole sat next to me.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "I was too rough with her. The next morning she was covered in bruises." I told him. Skipping the part about Nevah's biting kink.

"Ok." He frowned a little. "What's the big deal?"

"I bruised her. I, I just wanted to have a honeymoon where Nevah didn't have nightmares, where she didn't have to worry about anyone hurting her or judging her. But I did, I hurt her." I cried. "I left bruises on her like he did."

"That was years ago, Xavier. Ok, so maybe you could have been more gentle with her. But Nevah didn't care did she?" Cole chuckled a little. "If you hurt her, then she would have told you to stop. And by the sounds of things she didn't. It's fucked up, I know. You hate yourself because of it, i know. But for you to be ignoring her, and pushing her away for it, hurts her more than any bruise you can give her."

"I hurt autumn one time. It was our honeymoon as well. We had to come home because she was bleeding, heavier than a period. And you know what? I did the exact same thing you're doing right now. Autumn didn't like it, she just wanted me to hold her and I didn't. Just because you hurt her once, doesn't mean you'll do it again. I'll tell you, everyone single girl has been hurt during sex, and Danny has been hurt by Memphis. We've all learnt from that, to go rough like that girls want, but to stop before you lose control. Nevah needs you because she's your wife, she relies on you and you alone because you're the only one she trusts. It's ok, but you heard her crying? That's because she wants you, she needs you not because of the pain."

"But I still hurt her." I cried quietly.

"And I hurt autumn. I beat myself up for it for ages. But you can't hurt her physically, Nevah is so strong when I comes to physical pain because of her past. It's the mental pain she can't deal with. Now you go downstairs and hold her, tell her you love her. But you staying away will only hurt her more." Cole stated. He stood up and walked out of the room.

With a sigh, I went to the bathroom and splashed my face with cold water. With that, I went downstairs, pulled Nevah to my chest and told her how sorry I am. I held her as she cried, and she held me as I cried. But most of all, she didn't blame me. And Cole was right, it hurt her more from me ignoring her, not the bruises I caused her.

"I'm so sorry." I mumbled to her.

"I know. J-just don't do it again. I don't want you ignoring me." Nevah shook and cried in my arms.

"I won't. I won't mark you again either." I told her.

"I don't care about that. We both enjoyed ourselves so it doesn't matter. What matters is you pushing me away. I thought you were gonna leave me." Nevah sobbed. Everyone giving her looks of sympathy.

"I will never leave you, I've told you before. Never." I pulled away and kissed her.