Xavier and Nevah

46. I'm here

Xavier POV (Nevah's blanket👆)

"N-no! G-get o-off m-me. Help! Ahh!" Nevah screamed. My eyes shot open to her thrashing around, tears soaked her cheeks as she screamed and sobbed.

I didn't hesitate to pull her to my chest like I always do. "Nevah baby wake up." I rocked her. Her eyes opened, Nevah buried her face into my chest crying harder.

"Daddy." The small girl cried.

"Yeah baby. Daddy's got you." I rocked her. A soft knock came at the door, it opened to reveal Abuelo. His eyes soft as he looked at me rocking Nevah, tapping her bum to calm the small girl.

"She alright?" Came his soft voice, careful not to scare her.

"Yeah." I nodded. "I think we should get her to see someone. Talk about what happened to her. Shes," my eyes stung with unshed tears. "She shouldn't be like this. The hurt she feels."

"I know mate, I know. I'll go and have a look to see if there's any therapists or something like that near by." Abuelo told me. I nodded and he left, closing the door softly behind him.

"Daddy." Nevah whimpered and fisted my T-shirt.

"Yeah baby. Daddy's got you. I'm here." I moved her hair from her face and placed a kiss on her forehead. I didn't stop my movements of rocking her, my hand went back to her bum to tap it lightly to lull her back to sleep.

I grabbed her Winnie the Pooh blanket and put it close to her face. With one hand, Nevah rubbed the soft blanket while the other fisted my T-shirt keeping me close to her. I sighed trying not to let the tears fall.

Just seeing her like this, to hear her scream in her sleep kills me inside. It hurts knowing I can't do jack shit to stop it from happening. I can't stop the nightmares she's reliving in her sleep, I can't take away the fourteen years of abuse she's been through and it kills me.

Soon enough, my little Nevah fell asleep again. Yet her hand didn't loosen from my T-shirt, it maintained that grip like if she let go I'd vanish. Knowing she was asleep, I let out the tears I was holding back.

"Lo siento bebe. Lo siento mucho." I cried to a sleeping Nevah. I buried my face in the crook of her neck inhaling her scent. (I'm sorry baby. I'm so sorry)

After five minutes, I laid her down on the bed and stood up. I wiped my eyes before going downstairs. My mum gave me a look of sympathy whilst the others stayed silent.

"How is she?" Grandpa asked me in a soft whisper. His eyes held worry just like everyone else, but I'm sure mine held more than fucking worry for my girlfriend.

"Asleep now. Just about." I mumbled and sat down. Uncle Lewis rubbed my back as Hope held my hand with the other running through my hair and gripping it. "Have you found anything?" I looked at Abuelo.

"Not yet. But I'm looking." He replied. His eyes stayed on the laptop as he spoke.

"What's wrong with her?" Dev got my attention.

"Night terrors." I shrugged. "I guess it's the only way to put it. Nightmares. Reliving the trauma from when," I trailed off not being able to say it.

"From when she was in the care home." Gabbie told her daughter.

"What happened in the care home?" Dev asked. I guess no one really told her.

"So I'm not the only one the didn't know. Secrets people, when have we ever kept secrets?" Sebastian tried to lighten up the mood.

"Nevah was..." I gulped. "Nevah was abused. The trauma from that give her nightmares that cause her to scream and sometimes hit me while she's sleeping." I told her.

"Like mum?" Hope looked at me.

"No pequeña niña. Your mum only wakes up crying. Nevah, Nevah's much worse than that." Dad told her.

"What does this mean for Nevah?" Devyn asked.

"I don't know. It happens frequently now. I think that accident kind of took her back. It would only happen, once a week? Maybe twice. But after that accident it's gone up. Every nap, sometimes even more than once a night. I just don't know how to help her. To get her to have a full nights sleep." I rubbed both hands on my face.
~~~~~~~

After an hour of sitting in the living room, once again I heard Nevah. Her screams filled the house as she cried 'get off me' or 'stop' over and over again. I didn't waste time getting to my feet and running up the stairs, taking three at a time. I burst through our bedroom door and pulled her on to my lap again.

"Nevah baby. Wake up. Wake up." I shook her. Nevah's eyes opened, once again burying her face into my chest.

"Daddy. It's hurts daddy." Nevah sobbed. Her small fists clutching my T-shirt making her knuckles turn white. I rocked her while tapping her bum to soothe her. Her sobs ceased to stop but came out muffled by my chest, the wetness of her tears pooled on my T-shirt.

Once she was calm, I pulled her Winnie the Pooh up to her face where she rubbed it again. Her small hand feeling the softness of a comfort blanket with her other hand still clutching my T-shirt.

"It's ok baby. Daddy's got you." I kissed her head. Maybe she is what I think she is, but I don't know.

"Is she a little?" Dev stood at the doorway.

"I don't know. I think so." I nodded.

"I've read enough stories to know that some of the signs. I can give you a website to read if you want. It might come in handy and make a decide on it." She told me. I nodded and focused back on Nevah. I didn't even feel her hand leave my T-shirt to put her thumb in her mouth.

What am I gonna do with her? But i will always care for her.