HATE ME
CHAPTER FOURTEEN:
"Tuloy pa rin kaya yung surprise party?" I sighed, wondering what would be the answer to that question.
Nasa labas ako ngayon, kinakausap ang sarili dahil wala akong matinong makausap sa loob. Karamihan kasi sa kanila, tahimik parin.
I haven't even asked Lisha kung anong malaking kasalanan ang nagawa niya sa'kin. Minabuti kasi namin ni Roselle na ihatid siya sa kwarto para makapagpahinga. She kept saying sorry to me while crying. Mabuti nalang at nakatulog ito agad. I told Roselle to call me when Lisha wakes up.
I initially went to look for Harley but I couldn't find him.
Parang habang tumatagal, this outing is turning out to be a bad idea. Lahat yata kami, may kanya-kanyang iniisip.
Naglalakad-lakad ako sa dalampasigan. The sun is almost setting. Ang ganda ng dagat. The orange light forming a line where the sky meets the see is looking vibrant, making the place look magical. Buhay na buhay tignan.
I got lost in the view and didn't notice Harley approaching me. I waved at him. Kumaway din siya pabalik. Tumakbo ako palapit sa kanya while smiling kasi kanina ko pa siya hinahanap.
Harley smiled back but for the first time, it doesn't look real.
"Saan ka galing?"
"Diyan lang. Sa tabi-tabi." He tried to be in his usual self, pero iba talaga yung mood niya nitong mga nagdaang araw. I noticed it since the day we got here.
And from what Lisha revealed, may nangyari ngang confession sa byahe nila papunta rito. But why is he acting like this? Parang siya yung nareject kahit hindi naman. Sa iyak pa lang ni Lisha kanina, I know it did not went according to what she wanted.
I had the same reaction when I told Bern about my feelings that night. I acted like it was cool in front of him. Even pretended that I don't like him anymore just to save my pride pero pagdating ko sa bahay, umiyak ako.
Nandun kasi talaga yung thought na kahit alam mong wala talaga, you're still hoping na pwede kayo.
I know exactly how Lisha is feeling. Yung regret, na sana hindi ko nalang sinabi sa kanya. Yung sakit sa dibdib. Yung frustration kasi kahit rejected na nga, hindi parin mamatay-matay yung pag-asa sa puso mo.
"Jessie..." Nabalik ako sa realidad dahil sa pagtawag ni Harley. Napatingin ako sa kanya. He looked torn between wanting to ask me something or not.
"Ano yun?"
I should at least feel something negative towards him for making my best friend cry but I know Harley.
He's not like Bern na binalewala lang yung pagtatapat ko and rejected me, in the most cruel way possible. Asking me to be a panakip-butas to cope up with his breakup with Irish. But I won't dwell on it that much. Matagal ko na siyang napatawad and I'm doing my best to be a good friend to him.
So far, I think I'm doing a great job dahil hindi na ako katulad noon na sa lahat ng oras pinapairal yung feelings ko sa kanya. Now, wala ng malisya lahat. His kindness and sweet gestures. Tanggap ko na that he's naturally like that, not only to girls. He's like that to everyone. Mabait talaga si Anthony.
At nagawa niya lang yun sa'kin dahil nasasaktan siya. Pain can really make you do something so out of your character. It's crazily dangerous.
Harley's probably the most considerate person I know. And he's understanding and very sensitive too. Kaya kung pinaiyak man niya si Lisha, I know it's unintentional. Alam ko ring may rason at siguradong ipinaliwanag niya ito sa kaibigan ko. But both of them seemed shock and unrecovered.
