Hope - A Lord Of The Rings Chronicle

The Flame, The Wizard and the Balrog - Part I

Dawn in the mines came, and I woke up from Legolas’ prompting. I yawned as he greeted me, stretching my arms outward, my hands locked in fists.
“How are you feeling?” He asked.
“Sleepy.” I replied, before coughing slightly.
He chuckled a little. The sound emanating from his mouth was soft and melodious; a noise I wanted to record on my phone and play over and over again.
“I know that Raina.” He rolled his eyes playfully “I mean in terms of your health. Are you feeling any better?”
I paused, covering my mouth with my hand as another yawn claimed it.
Did I feel any better? Well, I felt neither hot nor cold, which seemed a good sign. My chest felt tight, my nose stuffy and there was a tickle in my throat, but at least I didn’t feel nausea, or vertigo.
The illness seemed to be letting up.
Now it was no more than a bad cold.

“A little better.” I smiled.
Legolas’ eyes flickered briefly, bright diamonds illuminating his soft irises, and he leaned forward. He placed his hand over my head.
“Aye, you’re right.” He smiled, letting go “Your fever has gone.”
“Told you-achoo!” I sniffed, causing him to smirk “So. I guess that means I don’t have to be carried today.”
He nodded.
“Thank you, Legolas.” I smiled, pushing my glasses up “For everything.”
He smiled back, and I swear the butterflies started racing again at that famous half-grin he always seemed to do.
“T’was my pleasure. I am glad to see you well.”

I continued to hold his gaze, my heart beginning to thrum in my chest. If it wasn’t for the panic in my heart, I would swear my fever was returning, for the temperature of the mines seemed to raise to 100 degrees. It was not normal this…not for someone like me. I’ll admit, I may have had a crush on Legolas before on earth and not admitted it, but this was something more. It was strange to me, feeling pain whenever I thought of him, anxiety whenever he looked my way, pain whenever he so much as nudged my fingers.

Not to mention the fact that I seemed to never manage to look away.

Finally, saving me from the torment, he stood up, and the moment was gone. My eyes flickered downward, remembering all that had occurred between us. Remembering that all Legolas saw me was as a friend…he said so himself.

But if so then why was Gandalf so sure that it wasn’t?

What made him, Aragorn and Merry and Pippin so eager to torment me with their goads and jokes? What made their hearts so sure and their words seem so true when they told me he loved me? For I knew he didn’t.

He couldn’t…. could he?

Distracting my from my thoughts, Pippin sauntered up to me. His face was dusty under the dim light of the mines, and his eyes had bags under them but he seemed as energetic as ever.
“Hello Raina….”
I pause, before answering.
“Hello.” I smile, before coughing.
“What are you thinking about?”
I clear my throat, standing upward.
“Nothing.”

After I finish packing, and have a quick bite to eat, we move onward, walking through the mines yet again. The journey is silent, nothing spoken except a quick whisper here and there from Merry and Pippin. Although this is the simple part, for I knew the bridge and the long climb upward came next, my heart still hammered in my chest and the walls of my throat were stuck together. Perspiration broke out on my forehead, and I felt like I was suffocating in these mines.

All because of one person.

Gandalf.

The attempt to push Legolas out of my mind had only led to him. His death seemed crucial, unavoidable, written in the stars. But that did not sway me. How could it ever be fair, that I knowingly let an innocent friend of so many, sacrifice his life in the mines of Moria, all for the sake of fate.

It was not in my blood.

Despite the seriousness of the matter, I smirked.

‘Way to go with that Shawn Mendes reference, Rains. You really like that song, don’t you?’
In truth I felt more deeply connected to Shawn Mendes than I had ever felt in my entire life, and I didn’t even like his music that much. Sure, I was into a couple songs, but never much of a diehard fan.
The lines of ‘In My Blood’ resonated with me now more than ever. Its like they were saying openly what I could not. What I wanted to, but my anxiety held back.