Taming River

Chapter Twenty Three

KAILEE POV

My eyes peeked open. Squinting, I closed them back when the light blinded me. When I finally opened them properly, I looked over to my side. She wasn't there. I felt a shot of panic run through my body, thinking she left. I abruptly turned and found myself screaming.

"What the fuck?" I asked the blonde.

She was kneeling near my bedside, looking at me weirdly.

"How do you do that?" She asked calmly.

"Do what? You're the one watching me sleep, you creep." I laid on my back.

She came to hover over me, a frown on her face. "You sleep so.....pretty. You look peaceful and relaxed. You don't dribble or anything. Even your snoring sounds cute." She hurried out, with a confused tone.

"I do not snore, River." I denied.

"Exactly, because it sounds more like soft sighs. Snores can't sound like that. They should be loud and unattractive. Not cute a-and adorable." She stated with a frown.

I sighed looking up at her. As I took her in, thoughts of last night rushed through my mind. I felt my face along with my entire body heat up. It was only then that I remembered I was still naked.

"Riv, I need to get up." I attempted to cover my naked chest but she was on the sheets.

She noticed and smirked. "Why?"

"Just move." I groaned.

She chuckled and got off. I went into the bathroom, a tiny bit annoyed when I saw that she left the toothpaste cap off again. I brushed my teeth and washed my face. I threw on the first thing I saw, which happened to be River's shirt. Walking back to her, she had a tray of breakfast on the bed.

"Hurry up, you took too long to wake up and it's almost cold." She beckoned me to sit next to her.

I did so smiling at her. Waffles, eggs, bacon and strawberries. "Thank you." I kissed her cheek and started eating.

Together we ate. With me feeding her because according to her, she was too tired after making the food.

"I have to go to work." She jumped up and disappeared in the bathroom.

I took that time to go down and clean up the mess she made. River really was a good cook but the girl was messy as fuck. Just as I finished up, she came down in uniform.

"Don't you look hot." I smirked, walking up to her.

"I know." She kissed me softly. "I'll see you tomorrow."

I frowned. "Why not after your shift ends?"

She chuckled. "Double shift today. I told you that already." She said then buried her face in my neck.

Right, she did. "I forgot, sorry. Be careful out there, okay?" I circled her torso with my arms.

She nodded and stood up after a few seconds. "I will. Bye, baby." Another kiss and she was out the door.

I sighed to myself, looking around my now silent house. Ever since River and I started dating, she had the place lively and homey. I was so used to her being here and I missed her terribly when she wasn't. It was Saturday which meant I could either finish my grading or call Edward over. After last night, I needed to talk to my best friend.

Half an hour later he showed up. I made more coffee and together we sat.

"So, what's up? Where's your girl?" He asked, blowing on the hot beverage.

"Work. I need advice on something." I said, biting my lip anxiously.

He raised a curious brow at me. "Anything." He replied softly.

I hesitated. Sure we had conversations like this before, we were best friends. We always confided in each other, but this felt different. "River and I got more intimate last night." I looked down to my coffee. "It was amazing but," I stopped not really sure what I wanted to say.

"But what? Did you go all the way, is that why we're having this conversation?" His voice started to get concerned.

"No no, not all the way but," I made eye contact with him. "I wanted to." I whispered the last part. "But I'm scared and the last time I tried penetration, it ended badly."

"K, listen. You don't have to do anything you're not ready for. Is River pressuring you?" He was in protective mode now.

"No, of course not! She's sweet and so understanding about everything. She really is something special, Ed." I smiled as I mentioned her.

"Good. That's good." He smiled. "Then what?"

I didn't answer right away. My eyes stayed on my untouched coffee in my hands. Erica, my ex and I tried penetration. It was with her fingers but I still couldn't go through with it. She got bored with our simple sex life. Even though I'd give her way more than I allowed on myself, she wanted me to give in. It didn't matter how much I explained that I couldn't just do it. She became tired because I never told her the actual truth, I doubted it would've helped anyway. I didn't blame her for wanting more. Eventually she broke up with me, but not before telling me how much of a bitch I was.

That relationship ending didn't exactly hurt me. I was more hurt by her words and actions. She wasn't the best girlfriend in any way. So after seven months, we parted. Sometimes, I still think something was wrong with me. It was over ten years ago and I still couldn't get past this last thing. River had more than proved to be different. She was patient, loving, caring and not to mention clingy. I loved clingy, I was too. Though not the annoying type of clingy, it was just the right amount. I trusted her and I wanted us to be able to take the next step.

"I think I'm ready." I told him only slightly hesitant.

"Are you sure?"

River never pressured me into anything. That's why I was willing to go further with her. Even before I told her about my past, she didn't just try to sleep with me. She wanted to know me.

"No, not entirely but I can't wait forever right?" I asked.

He sighed, putting his mug down. Edward came closer to me and took mine too. "Hey, just because you're in a relationship, doesn't mean you owe anyone sex. You do that when you are ready. What's the real reason?" He asked, holding my hands in his.

"I do want to, just not yet." I ran a hand through my still wet hair, getting my fingers a little tangled through my curls. "What if she can't wait? What if I make her hold off for too long and she leaves me?"

"Give her head." He shrugged.

"What?" I furrowed my brows.

"Suck her dick, Kailee." He rolled his eyes. "Look, you and I both know River is crazy about you. Do you have any idea how hard it is to have blue balls? She didn't release last night, right?" I shook my head. "That alone shows how much she cares about you because, let me tell you. That shit fucking sucks." He cringed. "Help the girl out until you can, you know."

"I've never done that before." I said quietly.

"Well duh, my little lesbian." He patted my head, I swatted it away. "But now you gotta learn because your girl has a dick." He smirked.

"Shut up." I leaned back on the couch.

"Think about it."

I groaned loudly, feeling frustrated with myself.

-E