not throwing away my shot

Chapter 21 - Badass Liza

POV ELIZA
I can't believe how stupid I've been. I have no idea what I was thinking - what I was getting myself into. I would never, ever of done anything like this usually. I feel so dirty and disgusting and beyond ashamed. I'm sobbing so loudly that I don't hear the door open and chatter of concerned voices, it's only when a pair of large, comforting hands cup my face that I realise it's James madison. My jemmy.

"James!" I exclaim in relief at the sight of the boy who I have such strong feelings for. But then it all comes flooding back. I sent the photos to him, which means he has some evolvement in them being leaked.
"Eliza, it was Thomas who posted that photo of you, he's told me everything. He asked you for those photos. God Eliza I'm so sorry"
My brain whirrs as it processes the information. It wasn't him? It... wasn't him! My heart lightens completely at the thought. He does love me, he does care. As awful as the photo is, as terrible as it is that the whole college has seen it, there's a beautiful silver lining.
"I know this probably isn't the best time and you'll most likely dump me when I tell you but I'm asexual Eliza. So honestly I would never of asked you for them photos. And even if I wasn't asexual, I would never pressure you. I care too much about you"
I launch my arms around his neck and hold him tight.
"I'm so glad you told me jemmy and I would never break up with you. You are an utter ray of sunshine"
"I love you Liza, we'll get through this, I promise"
"You're incredible,"
"By the way Alex" James turns away from me "next time set a better password. 'Ilovejohn' is quite predictable if I'm honest" he laughs gently.
"That was your password?" John puppy dog eyes at his boyfriend,
"Of course" Alex grins unusually shy
"You're so cute lex" John starts kissing him until Angelica clears her throat, making the boys turn a bashful rosey colour.
"Welcome to the present" she raises an eyebrow whilst laughing "personally I need to give Jefferson a piece of my mind.
"Me too" Alex puffs his chest out.
"Thank you guys so much, but honestly I think I'd like to talk to Thomas myself if that's okay" I say as confidently as I can, wiping away the remaining tears.
"Do you want any of us to come with you mon cheri?" Lafayette kindly asks
"I think it's best if I go alone, but thank you" I smile weakly
"We're all here if you need Liza" Peggy reassures, rubbing my back softly.

I take a deep breath and knock on Jefferson's door. Luckily on my walk here I didn't bump into anyone, I didn't have to face their judgement. That's a hurdle I don't think I can tackle quite yet.
"Coming" I hear a dejected muffled voice from the other side of the door. "Oh god" he mutters turning sheet white as we make eye contact.
"Thomas I think I need to speak with you"
"Yeah I think that's needed"
"I don't understand why you did it Thomas? I've never ever done anything to hurt you"
"I know..."
"And neither has jemmy"
"I know..."
"Then why?"
"I had to get back at hamilton. I never meant for it to go this far..."
"Thomas you've left me feeling completely helpless"
"Well maybe I could help..." he mumbles making advances towards me, tracing his fingers down my jawline.
"Are you serious?" I spit with anger "After all you've done? All you're gonna try and do is seduce me? Well it's not enough. I want an apology. I'm not wasting time on tears."
"I-I'm sorry" he stammers, taken aback.
"If you don't take it down and give Alexander his account back I'll provoke legal action. Are my answers to your satisfaction?"
"My god..."
"I'm glad we understand one another"

And with that I turn on my heels, completely empowered. Jefferson can't hurt me now, nobody can.

~~~~~
Promise next chapter will be back to lams, thank you SO much for reading<3