Alex Rider one shots

Mission:"Annoy Wolf" Is a Go (request)

"I'm sorry, Wolf. Your vocal chords are swollen," Snake says. Wolfs eyes widen and snake can almost hear him screaming with one look.

The look screams "is that bad?"

"You'll be fine after a couple days and some tea," Snake assured him with a roll of his eyes at his team leaders dramatics. Wolf basically deflated in relief while Eagle and Alex exchanged mischievous grins.

Fox sighs when he notices the two children's expressions. Snake then follows his eyesight and gives a huff of annoyance at what is sure to end very badly.

K-unit went their separate ways excluding Alex and Eagle who sat having a quiet conversation. The house was peaceful for a while. A while being about 20 minutes.

"My ex man brought his new girl friend I'm like oh MY GOD."

Eagle sang at the top of his lungs. Snake rolled his eyes and Fox decided to go for a run before things escalated. Wolf sat with his eyes wide and more than annoyed.

"You know," Alex begins while flopping himself on the couch across from Wolf. "I'm not going to do anything today. Working out seems like too much. And I have a headache from Wolfs excessive loudness," Alex complains about their leader who hasn't been able to talk all day.

Wolf sets his eyes on Alex with a hard glare and opens his mouth to say something.

"Wolf you can't speak or you'll make it worse," Snake scolds making Alex snort.

"I'm sorry, why was that Wolfie? I couldn't hear you," the teen exaggerates.

Wolf storms up to his room with one last glare making Alex laugh to himself softly.

"Can you please have some pity on me and not rial up Wolf," Snake says in an exasperated tone.

"Sorry Snake, no can do," he answers with a shrug.

The next event is a combined effort. Eagle and Alex had prepared for this. The two of them knew that Wolf sleeps off his rage and aggression so he's more than likely to be asleep. Their theory is confirmed when they hear his snoring through the door.

Alex decides to put his pick locking skills to use buy using a screwdriver to unlock Wolfs door as quietly as possible. The two of them walk in the room quietly which is not hard for the assassin trained child or the SAS soldier.

Grabbing Wolfs phone, Alex's takes a second to unlock it. Wolfs password was his birthday so it wasn't that fucking hard to figure out. Alex opened the camera in preparation.

Eagle put the whipped cream on Wolfs hand and got his own phone out to record this. With everything prepared, they finally decided to wake him.

Eagle took a feather and brushed it lightly against their leaders nose. He repeated the action a few times before Wolf lifted his whipped cream hand to his face.

The mans eyes snapped open in surprise.

"Mierda," Wolf snaps.

Alex quickly took the photo of Wolfs face and set it as Wolfs background before the man could even say anything.

When Wolf realized what just happened Eagle and Alex were already rushing out of the room. Wolf came running after them.

Wolf chased Alex and Eagle down the staircase and tackled Eagle onto the couch. They began wrestling in the couch and Wolf got Eagle into a chokehold.

"Oh come on Wolf let him go," Alex said. Wolf glared and took his free hand to pull Alex to the ground next to them. Wolf wrapped both of his arms around their necks as the two try to get out.

This continues on for about five minutes until Snake walks in.

"Oh for the love of," Snake says while looking up at the ceiling as if something up there would help him. "Hey let them go Wolf," he says while trying to break the three idiots up.

"Wolf," Snake scolds as he's ignored. Wolf goes to retort but Snake sends a glare. "Don't you dare fucking speak. Let those two go Wolf!"

"Fuck you Wolf," Snake says as he grabs Wolfs arms and get him to realize the dumbasses. He finally gets a grip on the leader and pulls him off. Wolf elbows him in the gut, hard, making snakes grip loosen enough that the man could easily get out.

Wolf goes back to tackling Eagle and Alex whole Snake is keeled over. Alex manages to maneuver around Wolf and grabs onto the cabinet to pull himself onto the counter to get away from te livid soldier.

A now pissed off Snake goes back to pull Wolf off of Eagle but Wolfs already got a grip on the man. Snake is pulling with everything he's got and Wolfs gripping to Eagle like none other.

"Release!" Snake yells to Wolf.

"I'm sorry," Eagle pleads. The fight keeps going and it's a battle of wills at the moment.

"I leave for 20 fucking minutes and this is what I come home to?" Fox says in the most annoyed tone they've ever heard from him. Well that's not totally true but it's close enough.

Snake, Wolf, Eagle and Alex all freeze where they are realizing how stupid they all look. Fox just rolls his eyes and walks upstairs to his room.

"Damn Wolf nice Lock Screen," Fox calls down making the leader glare some more.

"I'm taking the silence as an I'm so touched I don't know what to say," Alex says a bit sheepishly earning a harsher look from Wolf.

"Is it to late now to say sorryyyy," Alex sings pissing the man off more.

Alex decides he likes the Wolf who can't speak more. There's a lot less yelling.