Canada was hanging out with his new friends, learning all kinds of new things.
"Oooooh that's how you guys make knives!" Canada exclaimed, holding a makeshift knife.
"Yep, it's almost as fun as the water bottle gun," Sparks said.
"You guys are pretty cool, even Dave isn't so bad, why do you guys do illegal stuff though?" Canada asked.
"Fun," Cap'n said.
"Danger," Sparks said.
"Fighting people," Sarge said.
"Making an artistic statement about politics and social issues," pipsqueak said.
"I just really f*ckin hate doing taxes," Dave said.
"Sometimes in life, people just need an outlet. So, some misguided folk turn to the more illegal things, just for the thrill. Deep down, we're all searching for a thrill," Ole' Uncle said.
"Ahhh get outa here," Sparks said. And so they continued to talk about the beauty of arson and the fun nature of underground fight clubs.
"I'm just saying, fight club for teens. They think they're so cool, but just wait until they're in the hot seat," Sparks said.
"Ohhhhhh that's even more illegal!" Canada exclaimed, not exactly sure where he stood with all this, but he was enjoying himself nonetheless.
"Hmmmm no, the youth need a chance to not grow up like one of us. Maybe a doctor, or an actual artist," Sarge said.
"STREET ART IS ART!" Pipsqueak squeaked.
"You're a talented lad, why not find a different way to show yer art to the world? Maybe make some money off it too?" Cap'n asked. Pipsqueak crossed his arms.
"You sound like my mom," Pipsqueak said.
"Maybe you should listen to your mother while she's still around. I didn't and look at me," Ole' Uncle said. Everyone sat in silence for a bit.
".... I miss my mom," Canada said.
"Dead?" Sarge asked.
"...overseas... I came here for business purposes with a couple of friends... our flight left without us. Now I'm stuck here... I just hope I get out of this place in time for our next flight," Canada said.
"Your friends trying to bail you out?" Sparks asked.
"Hopefully...," Canada said.
Meanwhile, Mexico and America were on the verge of committing murder.
"COME ON I GOT INFINITE MONEY CANT YOU JUST LET MY BOY OUT?!?" Mexico exclaimed.
"I'm sorry sir, but I can't-," the guard said.
"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO YOURE MESSING WITH?!? I BASICALLY AM THE LAW!!! I CREATED ALL THIS SH*T!!!! IM YOUR F*CKING DAD," America exclaimed.
"Please listen ok? I can't let him out, I'm just a security guard. I don't have the authority," The guard said.
"F*CK! Can this day get any worse?!?" America exclaimed. Suddenly, he got a text.
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Meanwhile, back in jail, Canada and his friends were singing a sad country song.
"THE LONDON BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN, MY DADDYS DRUNK AGAIN IN TOWN, AND WE WAS ALL ALONE AND DIDNT KNOW WHAT WE COULD DO, WE WONDERED IF YOUD LET US STAY WITH YOU-," They sang with a bit too much emotion.
"That reminds me of my dad," Pipsqueak said.
"That reminds me of my lack of a dad," Sparks said.
"That reminds me of my grandfather.... damn he was a horrible dude. I'm usually against murder but I'm glad I did it," Canada said.
"whAT?" Pipsqueak exclaimed.
"I MEAN IT WAS INDIRECT AND HE WAS DYING ANYWAYS! While he was sick, I kinda sorta replaced his medicine with either rum or crushed up leaves in hot water... so tea, but made out of dead leaves I found and didn't wash the dirt off of," Canada explained.
"Wow....... did he at least deserve it?" Sarge asked.
"Yep, he beat my dad, my uncles, us, pretty much everyone and he was just all around terrible. But, he was rich and famous so...," Canada said.
"I hate those men. And they're successful, so they don't get no consequences...," Ole' Uncle said. To Canada's surprise, everyone nodded in agreement.
"Just like my dad, he's lying in a shallow grave now, just as he deserves," Sarge said.
"My mother was one of them too. I didn't exist to her until she needed a punching bag," Cap'n said.
"Oh... I'm sorry to hear that," Canada said. Everyone just shrugged.
Suddenly, a wall got blown up. On the other side, Canada saw Mexico and America in a stolen car.
"They came back for me!" Canada exclaimed.
"RUN BOY! RUN! AND STAY OUT OF TROUBLE! IF WE SEE YOU HERE AGAIN WE'LL KILL YOU!" Sarge exclaimed.
"THANKS SARGE! GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU!" Canada exclaimed, running to the car. He hopped in, and the trio sped out of there.
"Ok, we gotta go to the teleporter right now, this is our final chance!" America exclaimed. The trio started hearing a bunch of police sirens, and realized they were being followed by pretty much every police force in the area.
"F*CK! They probably got all the roads blocked off as well!" Mexico exclaimed.
"THEN DON'T TAKE THE ROADS!" America exclaimed. Mexico nodded and started swerving through alleyways and parking lots. There was a police car in front of them, which Mexico rammed into and then drove around.
"WHERE AM I GOING?!" Mexico exclaimed.
"THE OPPOSITE OF MY SEXUALITY," America exclaimed.
"WEIRD WAY TO SAY 'STRAIGHT' BUT OK," Mexico exclaimed. Meanwhile Canada was in the backseat drinking a juice box.
"OK WERE ALMOST THERE!" America exclaimed.
"What about our luggage?" Canada asked.
"We took care of that ahead of time! Now get ready for a car crash because the breaks stopped working!" Mexico exclaimed.
"WHAT," America exclaimed. The trio crashed into a building and climbed out of their car. They ran as fast as they could, America picking Mexico up because short people are fun to run with in your arms. They're like a little baby. It's fun trust me. They kicked down the door to the teleporter room, the police catching up to them. They leapt into the teleporter, and just like that, they were home.
"HOLY F*CKING SH*T WERE ALIVE!" America exclaimed, the trio group hugging on the floor of the UN building.
"Are you three ok?! You look like you were just in a car accident!" Greenland exclaimed.
"Oh you will NOT believe the adventure we had mom!" America exclaimed.
"I got arrested!" Canada exclaimed proudly.
"We stole a car!" Mexico exclaimed.
"And we had a lovely time in New York, we met some very nice people," America said. Greenland sighed.
"I'm just glad you three are home safe," Greenland said.
