The next morning, Nekomi walked downstairs to see the unthinkable; they found the fanfic collection she had written.
"NOOO THE ARCHIVES!!!!" Nekomi shrieked, running to the group and trying to tear the books away from them.
"I think you forgot I'm straight," Canada said.
"I didn't forget, I just imagined what it might be like if you weren't," Nekomi said.
"Even if he was gay I really don't think I'd be the one he'd go after," America said.
"Is this really what you think of us?" Mexico asked, holding a book with contents so steamy, the page was emitting fog.
"Noooooo! It's just.... fiction," Nekomi said.
"Yeah, but it's derived from truth," Greenland said.
"Ok look! I didn't just write smut! Are you ignoring the other books?" Nekomi said.
"Yeah, like the one where America almost leaped off a building and then got shot by a bunch of jealous enemies of his and then the last forty eight chapters are just people grieving?" Texas said.
"Oh, and just a little nitpick, you wrote me as one of the grievers? I'd actually be the person with the gun," Russia said, to which America glared at him.
"Seriously Nekomi... why'd you write that? Do you not like me or something?" America asked.
"Nooo! You got it all wrong! I wrote that because I love and appreciate you!" Nekomi exclaimed.
"Huh.... so why do I go through so much trauma?" America asked.
"Oh, Hollywood does this alllllll the tiiiiiiime! It's because they can't write creative, original, relatable and likable characters, so they just put the character through exponential amounts of sh*t, with their only character traits being what the internet thinks a depressed person is. Then, the audience has no choice but to pity-love them. It sucks, because depression is an actual problem, and not a character trait," California said.
"..... I'm sorry..... maybe I just needed to get some weight off my shoulders.... and maybe writing a fanfiction where a friend of mine dies isn't the best way to do that....," Nekomi said.
"Aw, it's ok Nekomi, we all make mistakes! Even the best of us have fantasized about our friends in a gay way!" America exclaimed, everyone's eyes darting to him.
"Um no I think that's just you," Russia said.
"Next time, if you're feeling down, you can just talk to us! But y'know, writing angsty stories can be a good thing, and a nice way to get stuff off your chest, but just be sure to be conscious of what you write and put out in the world," America said, ignoring Russia.
"And no more incest," Canada said.
"And cool it on the smut, and make sure everything is consensual. Consent is the magic word after all!" Mexico said.
"Ok....... can I still write ship books?" Nekomi said.
"Okkkk, we'll turn a blind eye on that one, you go right ahead," America said.
"Yeah, it's nice to see a world where mom and dad aren't divorced," Arizona said, reading a Mexame book.
"Am I the dad?" America asked.
"Nah, besides, you took the kids. You gotta be the mom for the meme to be canon in our relationship," Mexico said.
"I made crepés!" France exclaimed from the kitchen, and the conversation ended.
Once everyone got there crepés together, they sat down to eat. Canada however, tried to retreat to his room.
"Hey, where do you think you're going?" France asked.
