her patience and understanding. her virtue of love that fuses and discombobulates the togetherness of a forbidden force of nature and reality she yearns. two bodies, one soul ridden with dire consequences of togetherness; but still they seek to make...
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When dusk comes, when the touch of light had fully and officially revoked itself from the land, flora and fauna respond no matter what happened before, no matter the circumstance. Yet as mortals, we are more complex than the simple closing and opening of a bloom, more complicated than forms of flora hiding away or animalistic fauna that yawn so confidently into the shining of each fresh moon. Yet after all the waiting for Earth's natural LED light to spill over the tall tree tops and finely tipped mountain peaks, for another day to come to an end, to feel real warmth once more, she found herself stretching into the direction of New York's nightly rays of light. Trust in the ending of the day, trust in there being a tomorrow, trust in new beginnings. It's been so long that the feeling felt new to her, foreign. Maybe it was. It's a pretty sad comment on the state of the world. Her world, and on modern culture, along with where it takes the human brain. Perhaps it takes this long on one's periphery for that trust to come, as a shy kitten from a deep hole, unsure of what the brightness ahead promised. But she had a purpose, and so did everyone else in the world, one that's compatible and unique.
Trust.
She would rather hold a gun than form a trusting and loving bond with anyone. She found trust and love to be a lot scarier than bullets. Hence her confusing and irrational behaviour that is rational from her warped perspective when someone other than her grandmother takes interest in getting to know her. If one could show her that society could function properly, that she could form trusting bonds with others she viewed as "different" in some way, then one had a chance to reverse some societal decay in her life. The societal decay she was so used to.
After a hectic week of mental instability and irrationality within the walls of her father's home, being alone in the outdoors was a salve, a chance for true serenity to calm every part of her being. When she had been alone, the sweet company of her mental and the alignment of her chakras brought a balance, brought joy and a renewed sense of wonder. She loved to live in an equilibrium where there was wisdom in being in tune with the ebbs and flows of emotion. There was a solace in feeling the goodness, the openness of one's soul, in the gentle certainty that one was born to absorb and reflect heaven's love in the silence the world was blessed with, the silence she was accustomed to. It was something about having the ability to hear her own thoughts when they didn't go off on an abusive tangent. The ability to tune out all the negative energy from her outside world with the help and guidance of alignment and inner happiness, it brought such a great wave of satisfaction and happiness upon her mentally, and emotionally deprived self.
That self was somewhere, and was somewhere quiet and still as the days pass her by like pedestrians. Pass her by like the cars on the highway, the busy road approximately aways from the home she'd bide for the last three weeks. Watching the days pass, and isolating herself from anyone and anything that brought about negative emotions within her, carried negative energy in their own aura. Her body left in different locations while her mind vacationed in nirvana, her body allowing feelings of melancholy and trepidation to ebb and flow. Once her mind had overstayed its welcome upon the abode of the angels, it returned to the body she left on earth and shared her blissful experience. She counts her blessings, counts them like how she counted the days that passed her by. A month has rushed by and now she's ready for reality once again, ready to deal with the challenges of life with the help of avoidance and pure inner happiness and alignment. Avoiding what made her upset, avoiding what caused her to act out of character, and most of all, avoided what had put her in such a horrific mental and emotional situation. Avoided who had made her upset and caused her to act out of character, avoided him. He caused and administered both, controlled her mental along with the body and emotions it controlled. Emotions, her emotions a form of biochemical bank account; positivity deposits and negativity is as a withdrawal. Living in a society of competition, mortals in her diverse community took more than she could give, health of her brain and body deteriorates, society violent and unstable. It all linking back to the biochemical bank account and the lead indicator of too many withdrawals and lack of deposits is stress.
