The One I Hate (Ongoing)

41 [TOIH]

If this is a dream then this is the best dream ever. Ilang ulit kong kinurot ang sarili ko bago ko mapatunayan na totoo lahat ito. Na ang lahat ng ito ay hindi panaginip.   I just confess my feelings to Nash in a very unusual way. I was damn jealous, hindi ko napigilan at nasigaw ko iyon sa kanya. Umalis ako sa kanyang pagkakayakap at tinitigan siya.

“What? I’m real Jariesha, this is real.” malawak ang ngiti na pahayag nito.

“M-mahal mo ba talaga ako o nagbibiro kalang?”

Hindi ito sumagot at tumawa ng malakas na ikinainis ko. Kinain ko lahat ng hiya ko para itanong yun sa kanya. Tapos tatawana lang niya? May nakakatawa ba? I gathered all my strength and hit his arm.

“What?!” he asked. I look at him and he has this grin on his sface and I think I knew why.

“I get it you’re just making fun of me.”

Naiinis na tumalikod ako sa kanya at nagsimulang maglakad. Wow! Muntik na akong maniwala doon. Hindi nga Yesha, naniwala ka. You believe that jerk.  Lumingon ako at nakita kong kasama niya na naman si Margareth. Naguusap sila ng seryoso. I thought hahabulin niya ako. Great! I get inside the cottage and gathered all my things. I can’t face Nash after that stupid confession which he thinks is funny. He really is a big jerk and I am the dumbest person ever alive. I get my slippers and put it on my feet. Hinubad ko yung damit na binigay niya. Nasa ganoon akong posisyon ng pumasok siya. Malawak ang ngiti at sumisipol pa.

His smile fades and stares at me. “You are seducing me, after that confession huh? Ayaw mo talaga na makawala pa ako.”

I get the yellow sun dress in my bag and answer him. “Wow, dream on Cortez. Actually that confession was a mistake.” Sinuot ko yung damit at tinitigan siya. I can’t take back what I said but I can still save my ego.

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, really. You can have this bed all by yourself. Bye.” ngumiti ako ng pilit at sinukbit ang bag sa balikat ko. I get out of our room without looking at him. I push the door open pero hindi ito mabuksan. I tried hard but still hindi iyon mabuksan. The doors lock was inside but something outside is preventing me from opening it.

“This is bullshit!”

“You think you can go? Uh-uh, you stay here—with me.”

Nilingon ko si Nash at nakangisi ito habang nakasandal sa pinto ng kwarto. I raise my bag and throw it towards him.

“This is kidnapping! I’ll get you after this.” I shouted and pass through him.

“Go on, I don’t mind. Kung kailagan kitang ikulong dito para makinig ka sa sasabihin ko, gagawin ko Jariesha. I just can’t let you slip on my hands again. You just confess earlier and taking it back seconds ago was bullshit, Jariesha. You said you love me you can’t just take that. I know you mean it. You love me right? Admit it.” seryosong pahayag nito na nakasandal parin sa pinto ng kwarto.

“You just laugh at me Cortez sa tingin mo matutuwa ako? You made me feel cheap back there. I cried like a retard there, jealous and..and angry with the both of you. I confessed but what I get in return, a playful laugh? You make fun of me.”

“Fun? Is that how you asses that? I was laughing because you’re so damn adorable Jariesha. Kakasabi ko lang na mahal kita tapos tatanungin mo ako kung nagbibiro ba ako. You’re so damn slow, ilang beses ko bang ipinadama sayo na mahal kita? Maraming beses, napaka manhid mo lang kung hindi mo naramdaman yun.”