Torn [SHAWN MENDES]

~14~

Tapping the rhythm with his bare foot, Shawn imagined how the drums would sound with the song he was composing on his favorite acoustic guitar. Piper was taking her morning nap, so he had around ninety minutes to work, which he was taking full advantage of.

He now understood why Yaz felt a little frustrated whenever he traveled; parenting alone was pretty exhausting. He didn't need anyone to come help, but he was surprised by what little time he had to himself. He wanted to write during her nap yesterday, but there was laundry to wash and fold, dishes to do, and the living room needed to be picked up since there were toys and books everywhere.

The vibration of his phone pulled him away from his song, and he wouldn't have answered it if it had been anyone other than family. "Hey Aaliyah, what's up? Tell me you're calling to say you'll come for Piper's birthday. Mum and dad said they'd be here."

He'd texted his parents and sister the day before to invite them to California for the baby's big day. Even if the zoo party didn't work out, he wanted them there. It was time to mend the tears in their relationship.

"Hi, Shawn. That's not why I'm calling. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but there's something you need to know."

He stopped her before she could continue. "No one's hurt...or worse...are they?"

She hesitated for a second. "It's Earl. He passed away early this morning. He and Patricia were on a cruise to Alaska and he had a stroke. Taryn called me and asked that I tell you since you were so close to him."

"Earl's dead?" he asked incredulously. It just didn't seem possible that someone so vital could be gone.

"Yes. Taryn is hoping to fly to Alaska today to help her mom make the arrangements to bring the body back to Toronto."

He shuddered at the thought of that grim task. "Do you know when the service will be?"

"No. They might be waiting to plan that until after they get home. The circumstances are terrible and I could tell Taryn is frantic to get to her mom, so I didn't press her for details," Aaliyah told him.

"Should I call her? Is there anything I can do to help? I've got people who can get her on the earliest possible flight or I can arrange a private plane."

"I don't think so. I know your intentions are pure, but getting a call from you when she's wracked with grief might do more harm than good."

"Yeah...of course," he said as a hard lump formed in his throat. "You'll keep me posted?"

"I will. And as far as the birthday goes, we would love to come, but it's a matter of whether it will work with our schedule. We're so busy these days with tae kwon do and dance and school. Plus it's the month before the holidays and that time of the year is crazy."

"I understand. Call me if you hear any more about the service," he told her before they said goodbye.

Shawn sat in stunned silence as he processed the news his sister shared. Earl and Patricia had been his family for years and he loved them both. On his last trip home, he'd stopped by The Good Luck Lounge to see them, which had taken a lot of courage since they hadn't had much contact after the divorce. They'd both greeted him warmly and he stayed and talked to them for over an hour. This was a month after he'd married Yasmin, just before they found out she was pregnant, but they avoided discussing his wife. He understood why, of course. He hadn't been back to Toronto since then and now he regretted not having the chance to see Earl again.

He inhaled and then let the breath out slowly. Family was everything. He needed to make more of an effort to see his loved ones, because you never know when tragedy might strike. His parents were older than Earl. How could he live with himself if something happened to his dad or mum? They'd come to California twice to see Piper, but things weren't great between them.

His phone vibrated again and a picture of him and his mum lit up the screen. He was a teenager in the photo, but he vividly remembered when it was taken.

"I was just thinking about you," he said when he answered.

"Hi, love. Aaliyah told me she called you with the sad news, and I wanted to see how you're doing."

Something about the concern in her voice hit him hard and he started to cry. "I can't believe Earl's gone."

"It's such a shock. Your dad and I had dinner with them in August and he seemed just fine. They were so excited to take this trip."

It brought him comfort to know that his parents were still close to Taryn's. "The last contact I had with him was a text conversation about the Blue Jays six months ago. I wish I'd made more of an effort to keep in touch."

"He knew you cared about him. Both of them said how much they miss you."

"Have you reached out to Patricia?" he asked.

"I'm sure she's overwhelmed right now. I'm going to text Taryn, and she'll pass my love on to her mum. We'll go to the service, though I guess that's up in the air."

"I'll be there, too."

Karen was silent for a moment. "Shawn, I don't know if you should come. Taryn is going to be struggling and if you show up with..."

She didn't finish her sentence, but he knew what she was going to say. "He was like a second father to me."

"Aaliyah can talk to Taryn about it. They're still close. You need to respect her wishes, though."

"Don't worry, I won't crash a funeral if I'm not wanted there," he said bitterly.

"It's a touchy situation. You understand that, don't you?" she asked.

"Unfortunately, I do."

They talked for a few more minutes and then he sent a text to his wife asking her to call him when she had some time.

He left his office and went into the living room and collapsed onto the couch, his thoughts swimming. He'd been avoiding thinking about one thing in particular, but he couldn't keep Taryn out of his head forever. His heart was filled with empathy for her, and a second wave of tears came as he imagined her pain.

Jesus. She'd been through so much already. Her dad had abandoned them and then died before they had a chance to reconnect, she had a sexual predator for a stepfather who wanted to kill her at one point, and then she'd gone through the trauma of six miscarriages. Oh, and her asshole husband left her when she probably needed him most.

Every fiber in his being wanted to rush to her so that he could wrap her in his arms and comfort her, but that wasn't his job anymore. She was engaged to someone and they lived together. He was probably holding her right now, being the partner he'd failed to be when she'd needed him most.

A message popped up on his phone, which he'd set on the coffee table.

Talk now?

He called Yasmin and she answered right away.

"Hello, baby! I'm a little tipsy, since we drank champagne after our last rehearsal."

"Hey, Yaz. Aaliyah called with some bad news," he said soberly.

"Oh no! Is everyone okay?"

"No, Earl died."

Yasmin was quiet for a second. "Earl? Is he a family member? I'm sorry, but I don't recall meeting him when we went to Toronto."

"You didn't meet him. He's Taryn's stepfather."

"Did you know him well?" she asked, since this was the first she'd heard of this person.

"Yes. Very well. He was a big part of my life."

"I'm sorry, Shawn. My heart goes out to everyone who loved him."

"There's a chance, depending on a few things, that I might go to Toronto for the service."

"Is it soon? I can't come home to go with you. You know that, right?"

"There isn't a date yet, and I don't expect you to go," he told her.

"I'm your wife, so of course I'd go if I could," she responded a little huffily.

He sighed. "That's not what I meant. I don't expect you to fly home from Paris, though."

"But you might go?"

"I don't know yet."